Patience & Faith - a journey series #1 | ✔

34: Till Death Make Us Apart

"Imagine being happy once and for all, imagine forgiving all the time."

I woke up to the sound of waves crashing against the coast, the irresistible heat coming forth from the door Seema opened and the giggling sounds Zahra produced outside while gazing at the sun slowly rising.

It was breathtakingly beautiful and for a moment I forgot about all of my problems and responsibilities. I gazed and gazed, relishing in the beauty of it. Stepping out, I joined both of them on the sand, breathing in the salty humid air, the sounds of the waves, the sun slowly rising to give warmth.

I closed my eyes, it was amazing.

"Feel good?" It was more of a statement than a question.

"Alhamdulillah. When did we reach?" I asked wondering we should've been here before sunrise.

"It's been an hour, you were exhausted by all the tension and journey, so I didn't wake you up." She replied, making Zahra laugh as she crawled in the sand and failing miserably, without a hand's support she would always fall back. She still had to learn and it was some time before she did but In Sha Allah, she would eventually. As her father always wanted her to be a fast learner stating that she was as intelligent as he was and she would be a fighter. I usually rolled my eyes silently praying that was true but gave the impression that he was goading too much and never gave me the credit of having anything related to Zahra other than her nose. I smiled, and let the sun wash over me. It was peaceful for once. It helped me think better, with a stable mind and a heart that was no longer cold like last night.

I loved him to bits, it was truly obvious and an undying statement. I loved him and I couldn't live without him, and I was never going to take away his only child from him just because his Aunt had issues with me. I certainly would never rob Zahra of her father so I knew what I would do once I got home. I loved him and he knew that.

I just had to make him understand that these small insults sometimes hit big and they were not going to go unnoticed. He had to understand that all of these idiotic issues were not okay especially when I try my damn best to keep the peace.

I sighed, feeling better that I came to a good decision and relieved that I had a plan but for now I wanted to relax and it was guaranteed. I would get a sunburn today.

"What will you do? He doesn't know where we are and even if he did, I guess they were fewer chances of him coming after you." The truth, it was harsh and I wanted to kill myself before hearing it from another's mouth. He didn't come after me. He had many ways but he didn't.

"He has no excuse not to come after me Seema. He's the world's most fantastic businessman. He has ways equal to the CIA so he can't give me a lame excuse as to why he didn't come after me. If he doesn't it's because he's too egotistic." I stated dryly not wanting to talk anymore.

In my gown and hijab, I felt overly heated, the sun was doing me no good if I was covered from head to toe. "It's hot, let's go inside."

The idea of going inside the house was both exciting and dreadful for me. It was our childhood house, where my mother and father both shared their lives, love, and happiness. For a change, I thought of letting myself feel the amusement of memories after all I had a memory lane I always wanted to go down to especially when my father's death anniversary was near.

It was true, we Muslims didn't mourn too long because we knew what's gone is gone and we all will follow after the dead either way but celebrating deliberately on my father's death was crossing the line. I wasn't ready for. I wanted to celebrate our one-year marriage but then remembering what my father went through on the same day was too much for me to be happy selfishly. And what happened last night wasn't too big to take a reaction out of me but I had enough of this drama that kept finding its way to me. They never seemed to give me a break and it was frustrating in ways I couldn't quite describe.