Boys Like Boys [Nico di Angelo]

chapter twelve

  'Son of Thanatos,' the woman's voice boomed and echoed in the empty cavern. 'I believe we need to talk.'
 
  'Who are you?' I demanded and she gave me an evilly mischievous grin that was far more terrifying than the Stolls'.
 
'You can trust me, Cal. I won't-'
 
'It's Calum,' I argued and her smirk fell off of her face.
 
'Hm, interesting,' she hummed, before looking down at her nails, which I could see were long and sharp, and they were pitch black. 'Please, relax, son of Thanatos. I am not going to hurt you.'
 
I obliged, letting the tension fall out of my shoulders as they slumped back. She smiled, this time proudly, like she had just taught a dog to play dead.
 
'My name is Atë,' she introduced, her fingernails drumming slowly on the arm of her chair. The obsidian chair that glittered and shifted with sleek black eyes that seemed to be always trained on me. 'I want you to come with me.'
 
'C-Come with you?' I inquired, confusion muddling my mind.

'Yes. I can tell you're harboring feelings of resentment, Calum,' she said sultrily, her emerald green eyes gleaming with mischievousness. 'Towards Chiron, towards the Camp for hating you, for outcasting you.'
 
'No, I-'
 
'You can't lie to me, son of Thanatos. You're furious, you're livid. You hate every single person you come across aside from the few select ones that have tried to help you. No, I take that back. You don't trust any of them. You only feel safe when you're with Nico.'
 
I opened my mouth to protest, but I realized she was right. The others had been nice to me. Connor, Travis, Jason, Percy, Leo...they've tried to help me from the beginning, yet I don't trust them. I don't believe in them to stick around.
 
'Veda's out of the question. She was the only one you truly trusted before Nico and she betrayed you,' Atë trailed off. 'Makes you wonder, doesn't it?'
 
'Wonder what?'
 
'That maybe Nico will turn out like her,' she mused and I opened my mouth to argue, but shut it. Veda had dreams about Nico killing me, I had dreams of Nico trying to kill me, maybe...
 
'No, no,' I protested, tangling a hand in my hair. 'Nico trusts me-'
 
'Does he, son of Thanatos?'
 
'Stop, stop!' I cried out, black smoke curling around my feet. Nico doesn't trust you. How could he? He would kill you without thinking twice.
 
'The son of Hades is a loose cannon, Calum. He's a liability.'
 
I had to admit she was right. If my dreams had a prophetic foretelling, Nico might be the one that puts an end to my curse. To the curse that I am. Death is in my blood stream, chaos pumps itself through my veins. I cannot be controlled and I cannot be stopped.
 
'Join me, son of Thanatos. Put an end to the people that believe you're a monster. Succumb to the spite in your heart.'

'What do I have to do?'
 
Her lips curled into a smile, a deadly, venomous smile that had the poison of a thousand snakes. The darkness in her flew to me, settled itself into my brain and latched on like a parasite. I found myself mirroring the grin.
 
'Tell Veda to bring you to me.'
 
  Then, I woke up. Instead of sitting up and gasping for breath like I usually did, my eyes just fluttered open and I sat up, looking over to see Nico reading a book.

  "Glad to see you're awake," he mused, and I felt myself tense up as he looked at me. His eyes were a soft, dark green color, like basil, and suddenly, I felt the darkness in me subside. I took a deep breath and looked away from him. What had I been thinking in that dream? "I think that's the first time you haven't had a nightmare."

  I didn't answer, instead staring at the bed sheet as my dream replayed over and over again in my head. I heard Nico's bed creak, before he was in my line of sight, his eyes brows creased in worry. I felt myself relax. There was no way Nico would do anything to hurt me. He was safety, he was warmth.

  "Are you okay?" he whispered and I bit my lip, before shaking my head. He sat next to me and placed a soft hand on my knee. "Want to talk about it?"

  And I spilled.

  "There's this goddess that keeps visiting me in my dreams," I admitted. "She wants me to join her. She's evil and dark and smiles like a snake, and I want to fight her off, but I see her in myself sometimes. She wants me to join her, and this time, I almost...I almost gave in to the darkness."

  He shivered, and I felt my chest tighten. He was scared of me. Just like Jason was, just like the entire Camp was.

  "You're not...you're not going to, right?" he inquired and I looked away from him. He didn't trust me, just like Atë had said. He was a loose cannon, a liability. Scratch that - I was a loose cannon. I was the liability. How could anyone trust someone as fluid as me? "Listen, I trust you, Cal..." he trailed off. "I know it might not seem like it when I ask you stuff like that, but," he paused, before moving his head so our eyes met. I looked down at my lap, avoiding his soft eyes that invited me to melt into them. Suddenly, I felt soft fingertips brush over my cheek, before they settled onto my skin and gently pulled my face up to look into his eyes. My stomach fluttered and my cheeks burned as he gave me a look of desperation. "I trust you. I want to keep you safe. I just don't know where your head is at right now. You've had some ups and downs recently and I-I'm scared I'm going to lose you."

  My hand reached up to touch his wrist softly. His eyes didn't leave mine, as if he was trying to assure me that his word was pure.

  "You aren't. You aren't going to lose me, I promise," I whispered and Nico's eyes were so soft and warm and his hand rested cold against my cheek, but his touch was filled with warmth and serenity and home.

  "Don't join her. Don't give into the darkness. I know you want to, trust me, I know you just want to give in, but you can't, okay? Fight through it for me."

  I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak. I felt him pull me in so that his arms were wrapped around me tightly. I instinctively buried my face into his chest, clutching onto his shirt tightly as I felt tears well up in my eyes.

  "I'm sorry," I choked out, my voice wavering. "I'm so sorry."

  "Don't be, Cal. It's okay."

  "No, no, it's not," I argued.

  "Then it'll be okay," Nico reassured me as he rubbed my back lightly, hugging me tighter. "It's going to be okay."

  (A/N: This is legit my fave chapter oml you have no idea I'm dead the feels I just want them to dATE ALREADY. Also I forgot to update. I always do. Why)