Boys Like Boys [Nico di Angelo]

chapter thirty-three

I didn't have a clock, but I noticed it couldn't have been later than three in the morning. Nico was still sleeping peacefully, his arm still draped over our waist, our legs tangled together. I couldn't help the blush that warmed my cheeks up.

  I thought about what Thanatos had told me. Veda was dead and I had more powers that I originally thought. Then I realized I had only three days until I had to join Atë. Why didn't I ask for three weeks, or a month? Why didn't I fight harder for a longer time with Nico?

  Oh gods. Leaving him was going to be so hard.

  I tried to go back to sleep, but every time I dozed off, images of Atë flashed in my head. The visions she showed me of my friends dying never left my head, especially when I closed my eyes.

I wanted to sleep, but I couldn't. Three days was all I had with Nico. The thought made my body run cold. Now I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to stay awake all night and all day just to be with him these next seventy two hours. My heart felt as heavy as lead in my chest. I just couldn't do this. It was too much for me to handle.

Nico stirred awake and I realized the sun's rays were peeking through the windows. His eyes blinked open and found mine, a light blush littering his cheeks. I watched as he frowned, his eyebrows furrowed.

"What's wrong?" he inquired and I shook my head.

"N-Nothing, I..." I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Thanatos visited me in a dream last night and told me about my powers."

  "Then why do you look so upset?" he asked and I just sat up and shook my head.

  "It's...it's nothing. I'm just homesick," I lied, though it wasn't a total lie. Nico gave me a look that said, 'are you sure?' "It's just because Christmas is in three days and this'll be my last-" I paused, clearing my throat. "This will be my first Christmas without my mom."

  Nico glanced at me skeptically, like he knew he wasn't getting the whole truth. I felt guilty for lying to him, but I had no other choice. He couldn't know anything - especially if I was leaving in three days.

  "Are you sure you're okay? You took Atë's letter pretty hard last night," Nico asked, placing his hand over mine. I stared at it, how his pale and cold hand laid over my tan one, the contrast of our skin just like the contrast of where our priorities lied. He didn't deserve what I was doing to him. I didn't deserve someone like him. He laced our fingers together and gave my hand a soft squeeze. "Cal?"

  "I'm just...scared," I admitted, looking to him. He had a worried expression on his face and his eyes had softened. "I'm scared of her, Nico. I'm scared of the future and I'm scared of-" Of losing you. "There's this cloud that follows me and it won't let me forget about the things I've done in the past or the things I'll do in the future. It won't let me forget about the people I'll hurt and what I'll have to leave behind."

  "What are you talking about?" Nico asked, his eyes searching mine desperately.

  "Atë's never going to give up, Nico," I said, my hands beginning to tremble. "And I'm not strong enough to resist her much longer."

  "You can't say that," Nico snapped, his eyes growing angry. "You have to fight and push through it, you have to-"

  "I can't!" I cried out, tears burning my eyes. "I've tried everything. Don't you get that? This isn't going to end, it's not going to stop until Atë gets what she wants."

  "I've defeated Titans before, I've defeated gods, Calum, we can defeat a minor goddess-"

  "Not if she has an army of thousands," I admitted defeatedly, watching his expression fall. "She manipulates people easily. Eventually, she'll break you enough to defeat you. No one's strong enough to suffer through that and come out of it."

  "B-But you did, right? You endured what she made you go through and you're still here," Nico argued desperately, his eyes brimming with tears. How could I tell him I didn't? How could I tell him that I fell victim to Atë's torture and joined her? "Right, Cal?"

  I wrapped my arms around him tightly, feeling him return the favor. He sniffled a bit, before leaning over and kissing my temple gently.

  "Just help me get through these next few days," I whispered, my voice cracking. "Please."

  "Of course," he agreed, fisting the back of my shirt in his hands. "Always."

---

I was watching Nico train, taking in the way he moved quickly yet recklessly, his agility and small frame allowing him to dodge attacks and strike quicker than his opponents. Instead of dummies this time, it was real people, apparently from the Ares cabin.

Nico took a slash to the arm, before he blocked another attack and pointed the sword at his enemy's neck, stopping as to not hurt them. The guy he was fighting smirked and slapped the blade away. Nico didn't seem to like that too much. His hair stuck to his forehead with sweat and he was breathing heavily, glaring at the Ares kid.

"Nice work, di Angelo," the kid snarled. "Who knew someone like you could fight so well?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Nico inquired, pointing his sword back up.

"Oh, you know...the whole...thing."

"What thing?" Nico snarled.

"I figured you'd be gentle as a fairy," the Ares kid mocked, fluttering his eyelashes at Nico in a feminine way.

Nico realized what he meant and scowled at the kid, before kicking him as hard as he could in the stomach. The guy fell, clutching his stomach, Nico looming over him.

"You think just because I'm gay I can't kick your ass?" Nico inquired, the other demigods in the arena 'ooh'ing at the challenge. "Also, reality check. Your dad, the macho god of war, probably had a dick up his ass once or twice. Learn some respect," Nico snarled, before he pointed his sword at the guy's throat. "I dare you to doubt me just because I like guys. C'mon, say it," Nico taunted. The guy spluttered out an apology. "That's right, coward," Nico spit, before removing his sword and walking away. 

I tried to distract myself from how utterly hot that was by following Nico out of the arena. One of the Ares kid laughed and said, "I warned you not to pick on him, didn't I?"

I walked alongside Nico and realized he was shaking in anger, his fists clenched and his jaw set. I was actually...scared of him.

I reached over and slowly took his hand in mine, lacing our fingers together. He took a deep breath and looked at me, before stopping abruptly.

"I'm sorry you had to see that, I was-"

"No, please don't apologize," I countered. "I don't blame you."

"It makes me so angry when-"

"Calum! You're needed in the Big House," Jason said as he approached us, his blue eyes unusually sharp and calculating. "And Nico, I need to talk to you."