Chapter 39 - "I do not want your pity or sympathy."

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Carter woke to the sound of her father already moving about the apartment. A renewed stab of shock hit her, as the night before came back to her in full force. With a cutting pain in her chest, she listened as her father's even tread walked from one room to the next. The sound stopped outside her door. A gentle knock came.

"Sarge," he said. "You awake?"

Carter gave no answer as she flung aside the blankets and stood up. She knew he would hear the sound of her bare feet on the floor and have his answer. After a second, he walked away. Through getting ready, Carter managed to avoid seeing him. The smell of frying eggs and partially burned toast drifted through the apartment, but she took no notice of it.

Once she was done, she walked out to the living room. Her father had his back to her as pulled on his black suit jacket. At the sight, she had the feeling that someone had broken through her chest and was squeezing her heart in their hand. Before he could notice her, she made for the door. He turned, hearing her.

"I have breakfast for you," he said, stalling her.

"Not hungry."

She felt as if her stomach had been replaced by rope tangled in million tiny knots. The thought of eating seemed impossible. She reached for the door.

"I can give you a ride," her father said.

"I'm fine."

"Carter, you can't shut me out."

She twisted back to him, her face hard.

"I thought you knew that children learn all their habits from their parents."

She opened the door and was halfway out when her father's words stopped, her dead in her tracks.

"I love you, Sarge," he said, his voice quiet.

She titled her back towards him, as an invisible enemy used her heart as a punching bag.

"No, you don't," she said. "If you did you wouldn't be doing this."

She slammed the door shut and hurried down the stairs. Her father didn't call after her. The day was overcast, a bank of eerie clouds looming on the horizon. The neighborhood seemed subdued, the surrounding apartments silent. As she entered the alley, Maggie appeared. Carter's expression turned to stone, her battered and bruised heart shrinking away.

"He's inside," she said, before Maggie could speak.

Sliding her hands into her pockets, she kept moving forward without looking at Maggie. Maggie stepped into her path.

"I'm here to talk to you," she said.

Carter looked at her, all her emotions battling it out in her eyes.

"That's new," she said, her voice cold.

Maggie reached for Carter, but rethought it and retracted her hand.

"Carter," she said. "This isn't fair. You know I couldn't tell you."

"Nothing is fair," Carter said, her tone hard as rock. "I thought life would have taught you that by now. I'm just relearning that myself. I have a friend who betrayed me and a father who is once again a human bullet proof vest." Her eyes turned furious. "So life isn't fair and you're complaining to the wrong person."

She left Maggie frozen to the spot. Her thoughts stormed as she made her way to school. The world seemed to dim around her, as her emotions consumed her and started to suffocate her.

Expensive, sleek cars passed her as she walked through the front gates. More white vans had joined the collection by the side of the school. Muscled men with gruff voices called out to each other as they unloaded another layer of supplies.

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