Finding Beauty

[26] - Chapter Twenty-Six

I woke up to find myself laying in a meadow full of dandelions, weeds, and sunflowers. Butterflies were flying everywhere and the bees were humming over the sunflowers. Sitting up, I take in what I am wearing, a sunset orange colored strapless dress. My dark brown hair was curled and my tresses were down my back. I stood up and looked around to see myself standing in an endless yet beautiful meadow.

“Where am I?” I asked myself. I suddenly saw a reflection of myself before me and I gasped in shock. I looked different, I looked happy, confident, and free. It was probably because I was used to seeing my insecurity ghost in front of me.

“You’re real close to being free,” My reflection explained with a laugh. “Do you know why you were insecure?”

“I wish I did,” I sighed. “I found the key but I didn’t insert it into the keyhole yet.”

“Well, maybe the keyhole is front of you,” My reflection replied with a smile. “Just think harder, when did she appear?”

“She appeared when I was about to commit suicide,” I said to her.

“What were you thinking about then?”

“I was upset about being bullied and I was confused…?”

“How?”

“I guess I was upset that Stefanie left me because I don’t know when she was here, my insecurities just vanished.”

“Did you ever think why this was?”

I thought about it harder and then I didn’t realize came to me. “I was hiding behind her all of this time, wasn’t I? That’s why I took it out on her and I didn’t know who I was. I also didn’t think I was worth anything and I didn’t feel loved by anyone at all.”

“That’s exactly it, that’s the reason!” My reflection cheered with a smile. “Now how do you feel?”

“I feel bolder and different than I was before. I mean, sure I’m insecure sometimes but not as much as I was before. I also feel loved by a lot of people now Dean, Stefanie, and my parents finally.”

“So what do you realize?”

I smiled. “I became more confident now and Dean was actually a great friend. Maybe he’d love me someday.”

My reflection chuckled. “I think you’re ready to make your insecurity ghost disappear.”

“You really think so?” I asked happily.

“I know so.” Suddenly, my reflection faded away and I felt a cold chill among me. The meadow was starting to fade away into the dark and my dress was slipping away. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and told myself it was time for me to make her fade away.

 

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As soon as I woke up that Saturday morning, I knew what I had to do. I jumped out of my bed and got ready once and for all. I brushed my teeth and my hair, slipped on a pretty lime green dress that I had in my closet but I never wore, and glanced at myself in the mirror smiling. I looked…beautiful.

Taking a deep breath, I walked back into my room and closed the door behind me. “Okay, insecurity ghost!” I exclaimed. “I know why you were created and it was because I didn’t know who I was since I always hid behind my friend Stef. That’s why you were destroying my pictures of her and me when you first appeared. I also felt like I was nothing and that’s why you kept placing that knife in my room to symbolize how I felt about myself. Lastly, I felt like I wasn’t loved and that’s why you sabotaged me. You created Mrs. Rial who somehow influenced Kale to break girls’ hearts!”