Not a Love Story

Thirty-Three // Acting Weird

Oliver Greene

I drove home in a daze, both elated and terrified. I parked in the garage and turned the car off, my heart still racing. My fingers ran over my lips, still tingling from Ben's electric kiss.

"Fuck." I whispered, grabbing my backpack and exiting the car.

"Hi, honey! How was studying?" my mom asked, sitting in the living room.

"Uh, fine. Yeah, good." I said, seeing a confused look form at her face.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" she asked. I nodded, a tight lipped smile on my face.

"Yeah, fine. I'm just tired, so I think I'm gonna go to bed early." I said, gesturing for the stairs. She nodded, looking concerned.

"Okay. Sleep well, Oliver." she said, smiling at me.

"Night, mom." I responded before racing up the stairs. I shut my door and dropped my backpack at my desk, falling onto my bed.

That didn't actually happen, did it? Did I kiss Ben? And did he actually kiss me back?

I flopped down onto my back, groaning and running my hands over my face.

He ran off after. Oh god, he definitely regrets it. Oh fuck everything's been ruined. I stared at my ceiling, a mix of emotions washing over me. I sat up and went to my closet, changing into pajamas before collapsing back into bed. I grabbed my phone, staring at it.

Should I text him? Or will that make things worse? We need to talk at some point, I can't leave things the way they were-

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on my door and Henry peeking in.

"Hey." he said. I put my phone to the side, hoping Henry couldn't sense my inner turmoil.

"Hey." I responded, sitting up to look at him as he stepped into my room.

"Were you at the game?" he asked, a confused look on his face. I felt my cheeks start to burn.

"Uh, yeah. I finished up a project in the library after school and happened to finish before the game started. Thought I'd stop by." I said, shrugging and dropping my eyes into my lap. Henry's eyebrow quirked up.

"In the two years I've been playing you've never been to a game. Even when I started." he said, clearly still skeptical. I just shrugged again, not sure what to say and unwilling to disclose the actual reason for my sudden interest in the sport. "You're acting weird." he suddenly said. My eyes shot up to his.

"What? No I'm not!" I responded, realizing that was too defensive.

"Did something happen?" Henry asked, sitting on the edge of my bed.

"No." I said, a little too quickly, making Henry narrow his eyes at me.

"I know you're lying. I don't know why and I don't know what about, but I can tell you are." Henry said, sighing.

"I-" I started, not sure what I would even say. I just closed my mouth and shook my head.

"Well, I'm here if you want to talk. You know that right?" he said, concern on his face. I nodded.

"Yeah, thanks Hen." I said, offering him a small smile. Henry nodded and stood up.

"Okay then. Goodnight, Ol." he said.

"Night, Hen." I responded, watching him close the door behind him. I groaned and fell back onto my bed, staring at my phone again.

I need to talk to him. I concluded. I'll go over tomorrow and we can talk it out. I rolled over on my side and curled up, pulling the blankets over me. It's going to be fine. I just need to talk to him.

I tossed and turned for hours. Every time I closed my eyes the feeling of Ben close to me, his lips on mine and the image of him looking at me through hooded eyes danced around my head. I groaned and got out of bed, quietly padding down the stairs and into the backyard.

It was a clear night, the moon large and bright. The stars were illuminating the sky, twinkling in the distance. The flowers in the garden were just starting to bloom, some of the seeds I'd planted starting to sprout despite the increasingly cooler weather.

I brought my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, hugging them close to me. I felt a few tears drip down my face, unsure why. I quickly wiped them off and tilted my head to the sky, admiring the stars. I let out a breath as I scanned the sky, trying to find as many constellations as I could remember. My eyes slowly began to droop and my body began to feel weak. I made my way back inside and up to my room, yawning the whole time.

I curled up in bed, tightly wrapping myself in blankets. When I closed my eyes I still saw Ben. But not the Ben that ran away, the Ben that wanted to play tag on the football field, the Ben that lit up when he was on the field, his passion for the sport clear to anyone who watched. I slowly drifted into sleep, a light smile on my face and Ben in my thoughts.