Chapter twenty

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We sit in bed going form the most serious conversations to random stuff like his favourite pair of shoes. I admire the fact that he's giving me the chance to get to know him more, in my book he's adding points to himself.

Can you tell me why people keep calling me Luna? I question finally remembering it.

That's your title as my future wife and queen of the pack. He informs me but I'm still stuck on the start of his phrase, the most genuine smile grows on my face probably shining my white teeth.

I'm your future wife? I ask still grinning.

Yes. He gives me a soft smirk as I'm here still trying to grasp the idea of me marrying Quade, he takes the opportunity to fish for deeper answers Do you like the sound of that?

A little too much. I giggle to myself getting comfortable around him, my grin turns into a shy smile and Quade picks up on it.

Aviana Bhaltair. I look up at him.

Bhaltair? I repeat after him

It's Scottish meaning strong fighter, fitting you perfectly. His face grows certain as I nod to him.

So you're Scottish? I take my chance to pick at his ethnicity.

My great grand parents are Scottish and my grand parents moved here to settle down. My parent happen to be both Scottish too. He nods to me and I mirror him.

My mom is half Hispanic meaning I have a great variety of cousins somewhere but um, my dad never let us visit them so I don't um-I don't know them like that. I look up at him to find him just listening, I've never been given the right to talk about anything and it kinda feels great.

Do you want to meet them?

Oh I wish, I give him a sad smile looking down at our hands laced together. Mom would always talk about our abuela, our grandma, she would sneak in calls with her when he wasn't home. She adored us. I smile at the thought.

She um, I look up at him she would call me her mini princesa and my brother would always catch an attitude because he didn't get a nickname I chuckle to myself dropping my gaze. I think my mom would of liked you.

Yeah? I look up to see him smile.

Yeah, I smile but my brother... his eyebrows frown.

You're brother would love me, he tells me and I raise my eyebrows at him before excepting his truth.

I haven't been exposed to this much laughing or smiling in too long and it feel sort of unnatural to me, what I'm really grateful for is the fact that Quade's not taking this opportunity to pick at my past, instead he's making an effort to get to know me.

Have you ever tried speaking? His question is straight forward but doesn't surprise me.

I haven't said a word in over eight years, I don't even know how I sound. I meet his eyes and take a second to just take in his beauty, I watch how his curls hang on his forehead but they look shorter then the first one I saw him. Must have got his hair cut. What's the day?

It's Monday. He responds. I realize I don't even have all my school stuff, everything is literally still back home. I couldn't imagine what it would be like if I burned my house down, the amount of questions and accusations I'd have to go through. I'm not even sure if Quade would have my back if I burnt my house down.

The things I would do to just get out the house and now here I am, free but not totally. The crushing memories still come back to me, it's not easy getting ride of eight years worth of traumatizing incidents.

Last week I was just thinking about an escape plan, a way out. With barely enough strength to stand I was worrying about making it till my eighteenth birthday, I knew once I hit that I was legally free to go and anything he did would get him arrested for a long time. Now that I think about if I had enough courage to snitch he would already be locked up and not-

My father was a great man underneath the monstrous mask, he must have started off by loving my mother enough I marry her and then have a child. Oh how our mother tried so long to convince us it was just a phase and we'd have our father back. Just thinking about it upsets me.

"You get in your head a lot," I look up at Quade's undeniable statement "and it always upsets you." I feel my eyes well up and I let go of his hands to catch the tears in my palms. He's sick of me crying all the time, this is why I didn't want to let myself feel anything for him. I'm always fucking crying, all the time.

"Hey," his voice is soft full of empathy but that's not what I want, I don't want to be helpless all the time. He has such high hopes for us but I'm just not enough "Aviana." My name echoes in the room as I feel his hand gently run across my crossed legs. As much as his touch send electricity through me I push him away.

I basically blot out of bed and into the bathroom locking the door behind me. "Aviana!" A more nerve-wrecking tone comes out of him frightening me to back away from the locked door "Aviana open the fucking door!" His harsh words send me stumbling to the ground as I back away.

The doorknob wiggles aggressively reminding me of the moments my father would break down doors to get the chance to beat on me, my tears blur my vision as I choke in shock.

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