me: i'm gonna start updating regularly
also me: updates once a month
anyways this book will be finished by new years cause theres only a few chapters left:)
I walked around the classroom, reading out vocabulary words as the class had their last spelling test of the year. This was the only work I had for them today, as it was the last day before Christmas break... so just like any responsible teacher, I planned the rest of the day around watching holiday movies and snacks that I made the night before.
Just like I said... I'm a very responsible teacher.
"Okay, everyone close your books and stack them on my desk then go for recess. They'll all be marked when you come back."
"Miss A?" A small voice was heard from behind me as kids started piling out of the room. I turned around and a small smile crept onto my face.
"Yes, Ella?"
"Can I stay in with you?"
"Of course hun, you don't need to ask. What do you want to do?" I spoke softly, crouching down to Ella's level.
She explained that she wanted to work on a Christmas gift but that I couldn't see it, of course I said yes, so she made her way to the coat area and grabbed her backpack. Ella made her way to a table that was on the opposite end of the room to me, taking a few things out of her bag she began to work. I smiled lightly and made my way to my desk and began grading the tests.
"Ella,"
"Yes?" She looked up at me, wide eyed.
"You did really good on your spelling test, one-hundred percent."
She smiled and nodded her head, looking back down at her piece of paper. I swear, this girl was the most intelligent third grader I knew, she had gotten one-hundred on basically everything.
Not that it was hard to fail third grade, but if you could she would most definitely pass with honours.
Ella had slowly been opening up to me more and more, I was relieved that she felt so comfortable around me, enough to have a full conversation without turning away. That was my goal, though. I'd thought about what it would be like if she became my daughter.
Soon enough, the kids had all shuffled their way back inside of the class and I passed out popcorn and candy canes while the grinch played on the smartboard. I was sat at my desk answering emails when a knock sounded from the door, so I got up to answer it.
In the back of my head I was praying it wasn't Calum. We hadn't talked much since he confessed his love for me, mostly because it was awkward as all hell. Plus, I knew he was still mad at me. But truly his opinion didn't matter to me. Who I dated was none of his concern, and it wasn't my job to live up to whatever version of myself that he had in his head. If he wanted to be in my life, he wouldn't concern himself with miniscule things in mine.
Anyways, Harry and I had been sorting ourselves out. Of course, everything felt foreign at first. It was quite odd, we were trying to figure out how to act around each other while working out the dynamics of what we were, but fortunately we agreed to not put a label on anything. I was so grateful that Harry understood my way of thinking; that we needed to be completely okay around each other before jumping head first back into anything with labels, especially since we'd be in the public eye if we weren't careful.
"Harry?" I whispered, closing the door behind me as I stepped out of the room.
"Hi baby," He smiled, handing me a coffee cup.
"What are you doing here? How'd they let you in?" I smiled, giving him a small kiss on the cheek.
"Turns out you can get into anywhere if you're a pop-star." He smirked.
I flicked his arm and stuck out my tongue, "Careful, your head is starting to grow."
Harry rolled his eyes. "I thought it'd be nice to come and see you, I know you're not going home for the holidays so I was thinking we could spend it together?"
"That'd be lovely," I smiled, "If you wanna come watch the grinch while I answer emails be my guest, we're off at three-oh-two." I smiled, opening the door in front of me. Before we walked into the room completely Harry placed a short kiss on my lips, making sure none of the kids coule see.
He pulled up a mini chair to my desk and sat in it, turning his attention to the screen. After the first movie ended I put on the class stop-motion 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer', one of my favourite Christmas movies in the world.
A couple hours later, the bell had rung and the kids had left, except Ella. We had sat in my classroom for about thirty minutes after the bell rang everyday because her social worker couldn't come get her until three-thirty. I didn't mind though, Ella was a pleasure to have around. I'd grown quite fond of the small girl in the few months that I'd known her.
"Cindy should be here soon, do you want to read a book?" I smiled at Ella, while she looked between me and Harry, who was looking at me odly. I hadn't told him anything about Ella, because I knew how prone he was to worrying about even the smallest things.
She shook her head and motioned for me to come down to her level. I crouched as she pulled me close, leaning to whisper in my ear.
"I have something for you,"
"Want me to come with you to get it?"
She nodded and grabbed my hand, quickly making her way to the coat area. I mouthed 'be right back' to Harry as he looked at us quizically.
Ella reached into her bag and pulled out a drawing, then handed it to me. It was a pencil crayon sketch of people that seemed to be her and I standing outside in the snow, different patterned snowflakes falling from above us.
"Is this why you asked me to show you how to draw snowflakes last week?"
She nodded and looked up at me, I felt like I could cry. "Merry Christmas." She said, her voice sounding small as I looked at her.
"Thank you Ella." I smiled, tears welling in my eyes. "I love it." I said, bending down to hug her.
She hugged me back, and for a split second I thought about what it would be like to have her as my daughter, the thought only lasted a moment before I shook it off. I didn't think I was in the right place to raise a child.
"You reminded me, I have something for you," I reached to the top of the cubbies and pulled off a nicely wrapped box. The small girl stared at me wide-eyed, then began opening it.
Ella covered her mouth with her hand as she saw what was in the box, a package of one hundred-seventy pencial crayons, and a book with blank pages to draw on.
"Thank you," She said, coming back to me for a second hug.
"Ella?"
She turned around and waved at Cindy. "Get your stuff so we can go," Cindy smiled softly.
I stood back up and turned to Cindy. "She had a really good day today, even gave me a drawing as a Christmas gift."
"That's really good, be sure to let the counsellor know that she's making progress."
I nodded, before Cindy began to speak again.
"Also, I wanted to bring something up with you before the break, kinda just leave you to think about it for awhile..."
comment something thats been going on in your life that isnt covid related (if you feel comfortable doing so) it can be literally anything! i need to retain info that isnt about cororna virus and i love replying to comments aha
mine is i'm planning a trip to ireland for my 18th birthday in july with my best friend and we're gonna see the 1975 in concert assuming everything isnt still shit... and i got two tattoos a few days ago!
love u always mwah
