𝚂𝚞𝚗𝚁𝚊𝚢 ~ 𝚂𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎𝚛 𝚁𝚎𝚒𝚍

Ｃｈａｐｔｅｒ - ｔｅｎ

Past Tense

It's been months since I joined the BAU. 3 months to be exact. As many bad things we see in this line of work, I love it. I love being able to stop criminals and preventing them from killing again. Saving countless lives, and doing it with an amazing team. 

We do see somethings that are hard to unsee. It's scary thinking how there is so much darkness in the world and we face it head-on. Some days and some cases are hard but to get through I just have to push on. When we finish a case, just forget it, leave it there. That's how I can get through it.

Other than hard cases, I've gotten close with the team. I see Hotch and Rossi as parental figures in a way. Emily and JJ are like sisters I've never had. Derek is like a big brother who teases, a lot. Penelope is my best friend, always has been. Spencer is also one of my best friends. We got close after my first case. We always get paired up during cases, so it really was bound to happen. The team are some of my favorite people on the planet. They're like my 2nd family.

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"So," spencer said as we walked into our weekly trips on our day off to the cafe we both loved.

"So... what?" I asked as we sat down at our table with our drinks.

"Remember right before your first case, I kinda walked in on you and Garcia talking?"

"Yeah, and?"

"It's been 3 months since you joined the BAU and... I don't know."

"Are you asking me what we were talking about?" I asked. He nodded his head, taking a sip of his liquid sugar.

"Spencer that conversation was months ago, I don't remember half the things I said. Why?"

He shrugged and looked around the cafe.

Avoiding eye contact

The thing was, I do remember what I said, clearly. I just don't want to have this conversation with Spencer right now, or ever really. I don't want to drive a wedge into our friendship with the awkward fact that I had a crush on him in the past. I don't feel the same way anymore. Maybe I never had a crush on him, maybe I just found him interesting and wanted to get to know him, the way I know him now. Yeah, that's probably it.

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"Who was it?" Spencer asked as we walked down the side of the road later that day.

"Hmm?" I asked turning to face him.

"Who were you and Garcia talking about that day?"

"Spencer, why are you even asking."

"Because," he started stopping and facing me. "I have an idea but I want you to tell me."

I let out a deep breath and ran my hand through my hair. I turned to face him.

There is no getting out of this now.  Where's a new case when I need it?

"Okay, fine.... Um, you. We were talking about you." I have always been able to read Spencer, but at that moment I wasn't able to. So I continued.

"I don't know how Garcia came up with that thought and at the time I don't know exactly how I felt. I just pushed all of those feelings aside and they've all just disappeared now, I guess. I don't.... Like you like that anymore, then I barely knew you. Now your one of my best friends and I love our friendship."

"Why are you saying that with a questioning look?" he asked with an amused look on his face.

"Because, I've never told anyone that I used to like them, okay? It's a first me," I told him, slightly laughing.

"Well, it's a first for me too."

"Yeah right, Pretty boy." I scoffed.

"What it's true. Anyway, since we're sharing I used to like you then too," he said and started to walk again. Leaving me there to stand in complete shock.

My phone ringing in my pocket is what brought me back into reality.

"Wilson," I answered. 

It was Hotch, we had a case.