Behind Your Walls

bonus • 03

A M A Y A

He isn't here. He isn't here.

I am in a nightmare. This has to stop.

I twist and turn in my bed, clutching the comforter tightly, as Panther's pale face haunts me. He is standing before me, on the edge of my bed, in tattered clothes covered in blood. His eyes are on me, blank and motionless. The place where his heart should have been, is empty, replaced by a hole through which I can see my T.V set.

His hand holds a gun and as I stare, gasping heavily, he lifts his hand, pointing the barrel of the gun towards me.

"No," I gasp as my body starts to go light. "No...please don't. I...I'm sorry..."

He shows no flicker of emotion as his forefinger moves to the trigger which he presses hard and lets go before my scream leaves my throat.

"Am...Am...wake up!"

Somebody is shaking me and their touch pulls me out of the nightmare. I flung my eyelids open, inhaling a gulp of air loudly, and the first thing I see is Carter's face, hovering above me. He is bare-chested, hands grasping my arms as green eyes look with concern for me.

I am astounded for moments, not able to understand how he is here before I remember that he is back from rehab.

He is back home.

"Carter..." I exhale, lifting my upper body towards him as I wrap my arms around his neck, hugging him closely, welcoming the heat of his skin against mine.

He supports himself on his knees, his trouser-clad legs resting on either side of my thighs as he hugs me tight. His hands brush over my hair and I close my eyes, inhaling his sweet, musky scent as relief starts to wash over me.

"I got you, baby..." Carter breathes in my ear. "I'm here for you."

I open my eyes to find myself face-to-face with my T.V screen, the thing before which my dead man was standing to torment me. He isn't there anymore. Everything in my room looks clean and just as proper as they were when I went to bed. My desk is filled with books and certificates in need to be arranged, my bookshelf is intact and the A.C is still on. The chill suddenly gets me and I find the sweet beads in my body drying off on their own.

Just a nightmare. He won't come back anymore.

"Carter..." I say to him as I pull away and my eyes meet his. "Thank you..."

I cup his face between my hands and lean to kiss him. He lets me, our lips meeting mid-way, the taste of him igniting my veins. Carter holds my head, tilting my face to kiss me harder as he parts my lips with his tongue, invading my territories as our mouths play with each other.

Tears move down my eyes at the intensity of his kiss. My arms around his neck tighten, pressing him closer and closer to me until I find myself being pushed back on the bed with his mouth still attached to mine. I part my legs under the sheets to help him position himself comfortably above me. He doesn't seem to care though. He is too engrossed in exploring my mouth, his hand under my head shifting in such a way that I find him pillowing my head.

I welcome every touch of him like it is the utmost necessity.

My nightmares are still stamped in my mind; the horror of Panther Black coming back to punish me for his death biting at my very soul. Carter's kiss is the distraction I need and he knows that.

He knows what happened to me just now and he wouldn't ask about it. He knows because he shares a part of my nightmare. We are both victims of it and the more we avoid the topic, the better we feel.