Wickman •Nardo Wick•

41

Y'all, I been busy😭 and focused on other things. Slow updates until my next school break and I promise I'll update more often. Enjoy😭

Quote of the day

"Stop searching for happiness in the same place you lost it."

"DeSean?"

"Who that is," Nardo asks, taking the phone from me. "Who is this?"

"Her mother," I hear my mom yell. "Who are you?"

"Her husband," Nardo responds. She finna start cussing. Here we go.

"Husband? You better be fucking joking! ALEXANDRA!!"

"Mama, he playin," I tell her. "He's not my husband, he's my-"

I don't know what he is other than baby daddy and sex partner. Oh, and kidnapper. And convict. Jail breaker. Murderer. I could go on. Husband is the farthest from what he is.

"Fiancé," Nardo interrupts. He tryna get us both killed.

"I swear to God-"

"He's my boyfriend mom," I snatch the phone back. "There's no ring involved."

"And yet you're pregnant."

"Well," I take a deep breath. "Stuff happens. You meet someone who makes your world go round and you do things. He's my everything mama, and he takes care of me. I love him and he loves me. And I love this baby."

"Alex-"

"Mama listen. If you love me you'll understand. Even if you don't like it," I tell her and nardo sneaks behind me, kissing down my neck. I see him smiling big as hell, and smile myself. I hope he know I'm lying or this nigga feelings will be hurt. Anyways.

"Just come home. I wanna see you. Bring him. I don't care I just want to see my baby," she says and then hangs up.

"Damn," I say, placing my phone down.

"You really love me, baby," he asks, pecking my lips.

"Yea," I say and turn away.

"You don't," he says and then stands up. "What do I have to do to make you love me? What I gotta buy you? Who I gotta kill? What I gotta say?"

"Nardo, you can't make anyone love you," I say, placing my hands on his face. "It has to be natural, sudden and worth it. I'm supposed to feel safe. I'm supposed to be happy."

"And you're not?"

"No," I say honestly. He looks down and kisses my forehead.

"And that's all on me," he says, removing my hands. "I'm sorry."

"Don't say sorry," I tell him. "Just change."

"For you," he starts, placing his hands on my butt. "I'll do whatever you want."

Die. That's what I want. No it's not. Lord, I don't know what I want. I want my son to be strong and healthy- or daughter. I want to have a happy family. But it can't be. Look at my life right now. Look at what I deal with everyday. When my baby is born, what am I gonna do?

"Take me to my mom," I say, kissing his cheek and walking out the bathroom.

"Okay."

————///////

"You think she gon like me," Nardo asks me as he drives with his hand on my thigh.

"Absolutely not," I say, with all honesty. She will not. Not all all actually.