Exit Wounds | Noah Sebastian

F I V E

I wake up this morning with Caleb's hands on me, and I indulge him, mewling under his touch.  When we are done I throw on some clothes and grab breakfast from our favorite bakery in the Gulch.  We binge on donuts while we catch up on a show that we've been trying to watch, he puts his hand on my thigh while I snuggle into him on the couch.  His hands on me is like a glass of water in a desert and I think in this moment, maybe everything will be okay.  We were going to be just fine, as long as he gave me this sometimes.

"We're going to be so late," I tell Caleb, who suggested we take a shower together before the show tonight.  I look at my phone, I'm pretty sure the first band will be going on now.  It's ten after seven.  I hop into my boots and Caleb and I run downstairs to catch our Uber.

Caleb sits close to me in the Uber and wraps his arm around my waist as we chat absently on the way to the venue.  It feels like it used to feel, back when loving me was easy for him.

Caleb grabs my hand and winds our fingers together when we exit the car, I smile up at him. "Lanes!" I hear a voice call from the doors. Caleb barely contains an eyeroll but pulls me over to my best friend. Finn picks me up and hugs me tightly, before shaking Caleb's hand. It's all overly polite, and tense and I wish they got along better. They do try for my sake, but it would be better if we could all be best friends.

I see Noah approaching us from the corner of my eye, suddenly I'm nervous. I'm not sure what he can say to get me in trouble with Caleb, but the glint in his eye suggests he's about to make things uncomfortable.

"Lanes, good to see you are still in one piece," Noah smirks at me, and nudges Caleb with his elbow. Caleb goes rigid beside me and I can tell he's sizing Noah up. "I'm being rude, man, I'm Noah," he extends a hand to Caleb forcing him to let go of my hand to not be rude.

"Caleb," he replies tersely, I can see him give me a questioning look from my peripheral.

Noah let's out an excited noise and claps a large hand on Caleb's shoulder, "Ah!  The boyfriend."  Caleb visibly relaxes, although I'm not sure why exactly.  Does he think I wouldn't have told Noah that I had a boyfriend?  Does he think I lie about that when I meet new people?  Have I given him a reason to think that? 

"Noah is playing in one of the bands, I wrote a blog post about his business on Monday, I've told you all of this," I tell him, grabbing his hand again. "Come on, let's go get a drink." Caleb smirks at Noah in victory and leads me to the bar.

I hear Noah and Finn laughing behind us, but I ignore it. I distract Caleb by telling him that Jenna and Thad will be thrilled to see him. It's not true, of course, but they at least pretend to like him. I order my usual Terrapin, and Caleb grabs a bud light.

"So, Noah?" Caleb asks me. I've told him about Noah on three different occasions now, all about going to visit the ropes course. He just has a face to go with the name now and he's intimidated.

"Yeah, he's arrogant and entitled," I say, and mean it. I still do not care for his attitude.

Caleb hums in response, but his eyes are drawn to the stage.  The all girl group that I never catch the name of has just taken the stage.  They begin playing and Caleb and I move a little closer to the stage.  We can see fine from where we are, but it seems more polite that we move a little closer.

"They were great," Caleb comments when the girls leave the stage. I roll my eyes. 

"You just think they're hot." He shrugs at me and I swat at his chest. "Jerk," I mumble as he goes to get us another drink.

When Caleb returns, Noah's band has taken the stage.  I don't have a good excuse to not watch his performance, so I stand next to Caleb and Thadd and Jenna and I watch.  The drummer, Nick I think, is hammering on the drums.  His arms flail in the air around him.  He's fun to watch, but not as fun as Noah.  He doesn't do anything crazy, he's just performing, but he's everywhere and he has a commanding presence.  I can't take my eyes off of him. Caleb is looking at me a little too hard and I try to look unaffected by Noah. I'm pretty sure he sees through my act.

"The girl band was better," Caleb grumbles before going to the bar. I turn to protest, but he's long gone.

"I'm glad you finally caught my set," Noah says standing next to me, his hair is wet with sweat and his t-shirt clings to him. I nervously look for Caleb but he must be in the bathroom.

"Yeah, it was okay," I scowl. He's so cocky.

"I think you thought it was more than okay," he says in a singsong before disappearing. Caleb takes his spot a moment later. Caleb hands me a new beer as I watch him make eye contact with one of the girls in the first band. She smiles at him and he's trying to fight one of his own. I don't have time to question the exchange because Finn's band is on now. I do enjoy watching their set more than the others, but my best friend is so damn talented.

Finn finds us after their set, everyone is going out now that the show is over. I look to Caleb to gage his mood, he seems to be okay with it so I agree to tag along with my friends. Caleb and I catch a ride to to Broadway and pack into Paradise Park. It's after 11 and it seems like everyone in Nashville is in here. The whole place is decorated like a trailer park. There's green turf on the ground and a beat up Camaro sits on the corner. Hubcaps, license plates and graffiti cover the walls.

I push my way to the bar and order a beer for Caleb and I. It takes an unnecessarily long time, and when I come back I can't find Caleb. Finn has arrived and his new bff Noah stands next to him, towering over the crowd. I shove my way over to them.

"Have y'all seen Caleb?" I ask the pair, taking a sip of the beer. Johnny Cash plays too loudly overhead, and I have to crane my neck to look at Noah

Finn looks uncomfortable and says he's going to get a drink. Noah looks angry as he points to the back of the bar and stalks off to get a drink. I glance to where he pointed to see Noah talking to a pretty blond. We've been together long enough that his talking to another girl doesn't bother me. I know he loves me and I'm not the jealous type.

Finn and Noah return before Caleb finishes up his conversation with the random girl he's talking to.  I'm getting a little uncomfortable, he should have been back by now.  Finn has found a pretty alt girl to flirt with and Noah and I are awkwardly sipping our beers.

"Why are you letting him do that?" Noah suddenly says. His voice is soft, quiet and he has to get close to my ear to be heard in this loud bar. I've heard him but I'm not sure what he means.

"What are you talking about?" I ask, suddenly furious. How dare he ask about my relationship? Noah shakes his head and walks off. He walks right over to a brunette. Long dark hair, tall and thin. She looks like she could be a model and I stare at her a little too hard while Noah leans in and whispers on her ear.

I don't know why but I'm irritated at him.

Caleb still hasn't come back after I've ordered a new beer and the only other two people I know in this bar are flirting with girls. I feel stupid standing here and drinking alone. I walk to where I saw Caleb last, it's about time I broke up his conversation.

However, I can't find him anywhere. I'm angry, I'm drunk, and I'm tired. I can't find my damn boyfriend and my friends are ignoring me. So, like a big girl I order myself a ride home and leave everyone without saying goodbye.

I call an Uber and stand on the sidewalk, my skin sticky with the humidity in the air and the sweat from the crowded bar.  The ride is there in minutes and I sit in the back quietly while we make our way to my apartment.  I let myself into the quiet apartment, looking around.  There were no photos of Caleb and I hanging around, there's no trace of me even in this apartment.

It takes an hour before I start getting phone calls alternating from Finn and Caleb. I don't answer either call and send a simple text home to both of them.

It's another hour before Caleb finally let's himself in the apartment. Two fucking hours he stays out without me. And after we've had such a great day together.

"Why'd you leave without telling me?" Caleb demands when he finds me sitting on the couch.

"Why did you wait a full hour before coming home when you found out I wasn't there?" I counter. I don't have the energy for a fight, but I can't find it in me to roll over on this one.

"I left as soon as I got your texts, you can ask your friend," he tells me, his hands are waving wildly in the air as he talks.

"Alright, I'm going to bed," I get up and kiss him before going to the bedroom. I ignore how sticky his lips are.