I See You

Chapter Five

Ten minutes later Emma stood before her childhood home. A place where she'd grown up with the two greatest people who'd ever lived. They'd taken her in when her mother hadn't wanted her, and raised her and loved her as their own. Not once did she ever feel like a burden, or some kind of inconvenience. They had taught her what love actually was by simply giving her all the love she'd ever needed.

She looked at the sidewalk beneath her feet and remembered the time her Gramps had taught her how to play hopscotch on this very spot. He'd been trying so hard to keep her busy while her grandmother had been in the house working on a surprise birthday present. She smiled and felt her heart clench even as her eyes glazed over and blurred.

Emma swallowed down the lump and looked up the seemingly many steps to the interior of the house. The empty house, where her dear loving Gramps had died, by some evil person's hand. He was gone and because of that she knew that there were so many things missing from that house now. Nothing material she would be able to replace. No, the stuff missing she would never be able to find again.

There'd be no more cups of too strong chicory coffee by the fireplace on cold winter evenings. Or slightly burnt waffles made in the old waffle iron on Christmas morning. So many things like that were gone forever. Like his amazing laugh, his silliness and pranks. Gramps wouldn't hug her when she walked in there. She covered her mouth, not allowing the sob to break free. His hugs, when she was lonely, sick or sad. Or just because he had felt like giving her one. He'd always given the absolute best hugs! She wouldn't know that security of his love ever again. And damn it it wasn't fair!

Gramps had always called her his little happy thought. He and Grammy in turn had always been her safe and happy place. This house was the one place in the whole world she'd ever called home. It had been the one place where she knew without a doubt there was always love waiting for her. It was where she came when the world was too hard, or too bitterly cold. Here was the one space in the entire universe where her soul could come to recharge. And it wasn't because of the building that sat on this well kept lawn. No, it had been the man and woman who'd lived here and loved her for just being her.

They had been her home, not this house, and now because they were both gone; she felt homeless. Totally cast adrift and alone in the darkness around her. Emma hugged herself and gazed up at the golden light spilling down onto the porch. She didn't want to face that empty place; knowing that when she walked in there he wouldn't be there to greet her ever again. It seemed far too hard to face that fact. And to be honest, she didn't think she had the courage to.

"I've got you Emma," the warm voice filtered through her thoughts.

Emma lifted her hand and wiped tears that she'd been unaware were dripping from her chin. After a moment she looked up into his understanding eyes. "I don't know if I can do this," she whispered, blinking away more errant tears. "I thought I could, but now I'm not so sure."

Cody nodded his head in commiseration. "I know this is hard," he gently took her hand. "I will be right here with you okay? Cindy is here too. Hell, I'll call Tony and you can smack him with the nightstick I carry in my truck."

Emma couldn't help the small snort of laughter that spilled out. "Why would I do that?"

"Stress relief." Cody grinned. "Every time you feel angry, and you will, you can whack him over the head with the nightstick. It'll make you feel so much better, I promise." He looked around comically to make sure no one could hear them. "Secret just between us, I have to fight myself almost daily to not pull it out and hit him in the head."

"Thanks, but I better not." She smiled at his attempt to make her laugh. "I don't think he deserves a concussion," Emma replied, wiping her face with the linen handkerchief he pushed into her hand. Her gaze dropped down to the white fabric she held. Out of habit, her fingers closed around it, she sniffled as she dabbed her eyes. After a moment she looked up at him in confusion and awe. A warm sense of familiarity filled her, Gramps had always carried these in his pocket. How strange that he would as well. What were the odds?