Let's Not Meet Again

I Was The "Girlfriend" Of A Pedophile

Hi everyone. This is a story that I have been struggling to tell my whole life, but I think this is the right place for it. Despite everything I am about to describe, I'll preface by saying that today I am a happy, healthy, and successful person. So if anyone who reads this has experienced anything similar, know that you will okay. (Warning: This is a bit long).

This happened eight years ago when I was 14 years old. I was a fairly sheltered little girl. I had just transferred to a new school and I hadn't made any friends yet. I didn't fit in at all. I wore ill-fitting clothing, had unruly curly hair, and had never learned how to put on make up. I wasn't ugly, just not as pretty as the other girls, which makes first impressions hard in grade school.

On top of not fitting in, I lived very far away and had to take public transportation an hour both ways everyday. When I eventually did make friends, they didn't want to visit because it was such a hassle. So I was lonely a lot. I was lonely at school and I was lonely at home.

The only place where I fit in during this time was in the gaming community. I played tons of video games and made friends with other gamers of all ages. School was too easy for me and I always finished my homework on the subway, so when I got home I went straight to my room and gamed for hours every night. My parents both worked full time and weren't always around, so I typically had the house to myself.

I met Brandon online through some mutual gaming buddies. Brandon and I liked all the same games and got on really well. He was a very talented gamer and I admired his skill. We started hanging out every night; gaming, voice chatting, linking funny pictures. After a while our conversations became more personal and he started asking about my real life; my name, my age, my number, what state I lived in. It wasn't uncommon for people in our gaming community to exchange that information, so it didn't seem weird at the time. I learned about his life too; he was 24 years old, worked at a gas station, lived with his mom, and dad was out of the picture. He told me he just got out of a serious relationship. She left him and wasn't returning his calls. I felt really bad for him, despite him being an asshole and a loser, because he was obviously torn up about it and maybe a little depressed. I stayed up with him until 3am every night for a few nights just comforting him.

Something changed after that. He started saying things like, "I could really use a chick like you," and "If you were just a little older, I would totally hit that." To be honest, I was flattered. I still had no friends at school, this guy was paying tons of attention to me, and we had so much in common. Plus, I still thought "dating" was holding hands and going to the movies a few times. Brandon knew I was fourteen. He knew I was naïve. So he told me it was his mission to "corrupt" me. I had no idea what that meant. When he asked me to be his girlfriend, I didn't realize how fucked up that was. He made me swear it would be our "dirty secret" until I turned 16 in two years.

Over the next few weeks things... escalated. His comments about me got a lot more forward. Stuff like, "I don't care how old you are, I would fuck the shit out of you," "I bet you'd make a good little slut," "I bet you'd take it in the ass," and "When you turn 16 I'm gonna' take your virginity and then I'm going to take your anal virginity." It made me really uncomfortable, but not wanting to be rude, I'd just awkwardly laugh and not comment.

Then he started making demands. He said that, as a good girlfriend, I needed to meet his needs because he wasn't going to wait around for two years. He started telling me that I needed to send him dirty texts and take pictures of myself in my underwear. I resisted for a while. When I didn't do what he wanted he'd insult me. He'd say I was using him. He'd say I was a tease and a bitch. Then he'd give me the silent treatment for a while until I'd "learned my lesson." I was fourteen and desperate to keep my only friend (my "boyfriend"). I reluctantly sent a few incredibly awkward inappropriate texts. I took a few suggestive (but still covered up) pictures. I told him that it made me uncomfortable and I wasn't ready yet and he told me to shut up. I felt bad for bothering him.