To Feel Love

Let's Talk

(Kamski's POV)

She's mad at me? Disappointed? What did I do wrong? I immediately went to look for her, made sure she was ok. I'm taking her to safety.

All of this because I love her. I would do anything for her out of love.

What did I do wrong?

Gavin tries to relive the tension but it's not working.

"So uh... how long have you been... dating?" He asks.

"Only a few days..." I reply.

"Oh... I see. Uh... congrats?" He says.

I look over at him, defeated and exasperated. And he looks away, uncomfortable.

I have that effect on people.

We drive in virtual silence for another 45 minutes before I pull us over at a rest stop. We all get out to use the restroom.

As I'm leaving the bathroom, Gavin stops me.

"Look she's probably going to pull you aside to talk to you as soon as you walk out so I'm just gonna tell you here and now: do not fuck this up. You love that girl more than anything and I know it. She's probably pissed because you show no remorse over the people that lost their lives. Try to at least feign remorse. Emotion is hard for you. You gave those fucking things empathy. Now you need to fucking show some. Now go out there and fix your relationship." He says. He spins me around and pushes me out of the door.

I have never gotten a pep talk from my brother, but I DEFINITELY need that more often.

I walk out and look around for Sky. As soon as I see her she motions for me to come over to her.

I start walking over to her and all I can think is 'Oh fuck.'

As soon as I get close she pats the bench beside her. I sit down next to her.

"Elijah Kamski, you are a brilliant man." She says. That... is not what I expected.

"Thank you...? Is there a catch? There's gotta be a catch." I reply. She smack me in the back of my head.

"So you should have seen this shit coming. You gave emotions to machines that were being treated like slaves. What did you THINK would happen? Everything would be peaceful and happy? Do you remember what happened LAST time the slaves rose up? There was a war, dude." She says.

I hang my head. She's right. She's completely right.

"You're right, Skylar. I am so sorry. I should have thought about that." I say quietly.

"Yeah. You should have. Had you just used that big brain of yours to think just a LITTLE harder... this could have been avoided. We could have warned more people. We could have saved our friends..." She says. Her voice breaks and it stings my heart.

"Sky, I'm so sorry. I'll never make that mistake again." I tell her.

"You don't get it do you?! Our friends are dead! My friends, the only people who were there for me when YOU weren't. My friends, the people who loved me unconditionally. My friends, the ones who pushed me to fucking reach out to you. Without them we would not be together. I'd be dead alongside them. Jazzy died ON HER BIRTHDAY! How would you feel if someone you loved created something without thinking about the consequences, and the creation goes haywire and kills me and your brother? How would you feel, Kam?!" She shouts.

I'd feel terrible. I would be pissed at... oh. I'd blame the creator. This IS my fault. I've been so insensitive... Sky has lost her friends, they were practically family. They WERE my friends too...

"I... I'm an idiot... Fuck... I ruined your life, Sky." I say. I get it now.

"Just a bit, Kam. I'm...glad you're okay though. And Gavin." She says. She sighs and shakes her head. "I love you, Elijah. But I'm going to need some time before I can fully love you again."

"I... I understand. I won't stop loving you, Sky. I don't think I can. I hope you don't mind." I say.

"Go ahead. I'm just warning you that I will not be returning your love as strong as you're giving out. I need time to recover from this. I need time to grieve." She replies.

"Take as much time as you need. I'm really so sorry." I tell her. We stand and head back to the car. Gavin is inside playing a game on his phone.

I open the door and get in. Sky gets into the back seat again.

"You know, Gav, those things will rot your brain." I say.

"What happened to you, then? You've never played video games but you're an idiot." He replies. I'm about to snap at him but Sky starts laughing. It's a good sound. I decide to just take the insult and move on.

It's time to go home.

I inherited out parents home after they died. It will be nice to be home again.

Sky can see her mom and let her know she's safe.

Maybe things will be back to like they were when we were kids.

I look back at her as she attempts to sleep. She looks so precious.

I'm on thin ice already.

Don't fuck up anymore, Elijah.

I love her. I can't lose her.

Even though I deserve to.