WEAK 4 YOU [fanfiction]

X witnessed

Taehyung POV:

After Yoongi left me behind, I was laying down on the cold floor in the men's toilet, looking up at the ceiling. I didn't care about the dirt I was laying in because I felt like a piece of cr*p myself. Then I slowly closed my eyes. I had again lost control over myself. I transferred all my accumulated frustration to Jungkook, who was not even the one to blame in the first place. But I didn't care what he felt. I don't care about other people! I don't! Whoever thinks anything different doesn't know me. Feeling guilty is for weak people and I am not weak. I am not!

Also, I feel better now, don't I?!

The way he looked me in the eyes the first time, was full of fear. This time it was full of pain. I caused his pain. It made me excited. It's like I had lost control of what I was doing. As if a beast is living inside of me that doesn't want to be liked or smiled at. I don't want any sympathy or empathy. I just want to be left the f*ck alone.

Why did I do that to him?

When I did all this, it felt so right. Maybe if he had never smiled at me the way he did, this wouldn't have happened. Is what I am doing right now victim blaming? The f*ck? Am I a sex offender now? If this comes to the public, my life will probably only get worse. 

But now that Jungkook is gone, it feels wrong. It makes my heart race, thinking about the way he looked at me, so helpless, like a deer. What did I do to him? Why did I do it?

Slowly the guilt began to catch me, not noticeable yet.

Reader POV:

For the next few days, Jungkook didn't show up at the High School. Everyone was talking about him. About him having Sex in the toilet with some unidentified guy. About him being gay. All the lies would dominate over the truth that was the assault that happened.

Yoongi was the witness who was faking the news to keep Taehyung safe, even though he was in the mood to punch the shit out of him. But he was his longtime friend. He needs to shelter Taehyung from blame. He felt responsible for his mentally sick friend.

Jungkook represses the true memories and almost starts to believe his lies. Breaking. He began to choke on his lies. It felt as if nobody cared about what really happened to Jungkook. The reason he had a ripped T-shirt and a back full of bleeding scratch marks must be a sex story. The rumour must be the truth. Jungkook is a slut.

After a long day with busy schedules, Hoseok made his way to Jungkook's dorm, after he hasn't picked up even one call or answered any text messages today. That is why he decided to break into his room before the younger boy would rot in his own apartment.

He really was worried, but after he heard what happened he was too confused to think clearly so the first time he dropped by was after 5 days. He needed time. Maybe Jungkook needed time too.

Smashing through the door, he looked around the room. It was thick air everywhere, he even needed to hold his nose because it was so stinky. Then he saw him. Rolled up like an embryo, sleeping on the floor in front of the window. Beer bottles lying around. "How did he even get those?", the black haired asked himself.

Hoseok never saw his best friend in such a bad condition, because most of the time they spent together, they had fun and couldn't stop laughing. He missed the cocky Jungkook. Everything changed after Taehyung showed up at his place.

He kneels beside the otherwise strong boy, who was shivering now and his eyes were swollen and red looking, he must have cried a lot.

"Oh god Jungkook, I should have come sooner," Hoseok murmured.

And then he felt something hurting in his body, but it wasn't normal. He gets this feeling every time he looks at Jungkook. Seeing his boy fucked up just made the feeling in his thorax stronger and more painful. The moment he was realising, that he loved his best friend, he got really mad at himself because he then realised the reason why he didn't come earlier: because he was overwhelmed by the thought, that Jungkook was gay, too.