What Might We Deduce About His Heart? (SHERLOCK X READER)

Chapter 18

... has it been a month? :dddd a new year you say?

~~~~~

You sat in your apartment that you got with Sherlock, or that you share with Sherlock. He got this apartment with John. You were sitting in John's chair, Mycroft notified you by text that he will be visiting you the next morning as work was pressing. You had replied that you will visit him at work the next morning. 

The hard part will be done tomorrow. 

For now, you had to face Sherlock, well you didn't have to. You felt this need to or whatever. He should be home any minute now. 

You decided to distract yourself with one of the books that laid on John's side table. Funny. Even though John really didn't live here anymore you could never bring yourself to say your side table or your chair. 

It was still very much John's as John still stood by Sherlock's side. 

Perhaps it was crazy to do what you did to Mycroft. To avoid your own feelings you tried to make up feelings. 

You cringed at yourself knowing this happened before. 

And it involved the same people. 

"What should I do Mycroft? I don't want to have feelings," you looked up at Sherlock's older brother confused. He was laughing. 

"Feelings aren't as bad as we Holmes make them out to be, I mean our parents very much feel love and-"

"I don't want to hear about that, I want to hear about what I can do to get rid of these feelings, they'll only be in the way," you ignored the look that Mycroft had on his face, he looked annoyed. You understood his annoyance. You even were annoyed yourself, only wanting to get rid of everything that made you feel this way.

"You could try to project these feelings onto someone else?" you shook your head.

"Don't be stupid, I don't feel this with anyone else," you stated.

"That'll be the point you know," Mycroft rolled his eyes. You wanted to take his advice since this is Mycroft and he is 7 years your senior.

"(Y/n), where are you?" you glanced up at Sherlock, shaking your head at the resentment you felt towards yourself for having put Mycroft through this. How could you do this to the brothers? 

How can someone affect you so badly? You glared at Sherlock who's face showed confusion for once.