Way of the Wolf: Redemption

Chapter 10 ~ My Keeper

Chapter 10: My Keeper
~

"I think you're safe to try shifting tomorrow if you like. It's healed well, considering," Madden announced, patting my calf only to cringe and apologise when I yelped. How was this male their healer?

"That's good news. I was worried, she's still limping badly," Bjarke said, looking over at Madden and not at me.

I sighed and lay back in the grass, letting the two males discuss my health. My belly was rounded from being forced to eat more than I felt I could during the evening meal. At first I'd worried I was going to throw it all back up but I'd managed to keep it down, and that apparently meant I was making progress.

Sinking my fingers into the grass beside me, I half listened to what was being said. I needed to keep eating, I still wasn't eating enough. Bullshit. I'd eaten more in the last few days than I'd eaten in the whole of the last month or two. Of course, these wolves ate like kings everyday. It was no wonder a wolf like Valdis hated them so much.

I frowned.

Was he right to hate them? Valdis had been born in the wild and he'd never joined a pack because he didn't want to bow to an alpha, to be constrained to a territory. But he'd twisted the truth and warped my beliefs until I thought I couldn't survive without him. I'd begged at his feet, I saw that in a different, darker light. I'd begged him not to leave me, the male who'd beaten and raped me, and allowed others to do the same. That male who'd ordered us to kill our own kind at a chance of food. My frown deepened. Who was the real enemy?

Pushing myself up, there was one thing I needed to know. "What will happen to me when I go into season?"

I was terrified of the answer, and I wasn't sure they would tell me the truth either. The two males stopped talking to look at me. Bjarke was frowning now too but Madden just looked a little surprised. He leaned in and took a deep inhale of my scent that had Bjarke cuffing him over the back of the head.

The healer glared, rubbing the tender spot.

"Why do you ask? You don't smell close to your heat," he replied.

"I want to know what will happen," I repeated, keeping my gaze on the grass.

The Beta hummed, tipping his head as he gripped my chin to lift it. "You want to know if you'll be given to any male that wants you. Is that how it was for you before?"

I wanted to deny it. The truth that I'd been fought over like scraps of meat until Valdis got bored of watching the fighting was more like a horrible nightmare now than an occurrance I was alright living with.

"Valdis sometimes stepped in before one of his wolves could get to me. Other times he waited a while." I shrugged, feeling numb as I spoke. "It wasn't so bad if they weren't in fur. I don't like the knot, males get aggressive when they tie."

They both stared at me as if I'd said something horrible. Madden's mouth hung open and I wished I hadn't said anything at all. Surely this was nothing new to them. It was biology. Something every female went through.

"You went through this every time?" The Beta's voice was rough with anger I could smell it on his skin. At my nod, he growled furiously and I flinched back in fear. Had I done something wrong?

He stood without saying anything to me, marching over to where his Alpha sat. Madden tried to settle me but his touch and low rumble didn't work the Beta's did.

"I shouldn't have told you both that," I whimpered, burying my face against my knees.

Madden hushed me. "I'm glad you trust us enough to tell us. Bjarke isn't angry at you, pup, I promise. To answer your question, whatever you want to happen when you go into season will be what happens. If you want a male, or even a female, I'm sure one will be willing. If you want left alone, you will be left alone. No wolf has a right to take a female simply because they're in heat."