Dysfunctional Lover

31.

Your relationship should make you feel safe, happy and loved... not tense, scared and anxious.

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

I wake up with a start, Kai's arms around me, the events of last night pouring into my head like the worst kind of nightmare.

Getting out of the cage of his arms carefully, I go back to my room to check up on Chris.

"Christina.." I call as I open the door, only to be greeted by an empty room. "Fuck!"

I run out of the room, into the common room, on the verge of tears. My hands go through my hairs hard in frustration. Where did she go?

I take my guess and set out to Chris's boyfriend's place. Once there, I ring the doorbell continuously until a house worker comes running to the gates.

"Where is he!?" I shout at her. "Where is Liam!?"

She looks surprised and confused. "Um... he is not home.. he.."

"Don't lie to me! Tell me where is he and where is my sister!" I shout, louder than before.

"I swear to god they are not here."

Something in her eyes makes me believe her.

Where the hell are you Chris?

My phone rings for the hundredth time and I know it must be Kai who is calling but I won't pick up. I can't.

I switch to my last resort and call Jonathan. He picks up on the first ring.

"Yes. Chris is here. In her room. With Liam. Indiana and I are outside the door. And we have no clue what to do." He rants before I can ask anything.

"I'll be right there."

---------------------------------

As Jonathan told, he and Indiana are right outside Chris's room and I can hear loud, arguing noises from inside.

In rage, I grab Jonathan by his collar and cast my glaring eyes at both of them.

"How could you not tell me when you knew what a shithole Chris was in!? How could you not!?" I am so angry, I want to slap both of them and cry my eyes out at the same time.

But then I hear Chris's scream from inside her room and drop my hands from his collar.

I barge inside the room and find Chris cowering while Liam has his hand raised.

"Get out of here." I say as calmly as I can manage to under the circumstances.

Liam glares at me. "Don't tell me what to do you little bitch."

"Do not make me repeat myself." I raise my phone. "One call and you will regret not leaving when I told you to." I warn.

"Elena..." Chris starts.

"Shut up Chris." I cut her.

I'm shaking from inside but I cannot show my weaknesses in front of him. I need to be as hard as steel. The heavy dose of emotions is not helping at all. I try my level best of keeping my breaths stable and

He wavers after a few seconds. "Fine! I'm done here anyway." He turns his attention to Chris. "I'm done with you. I'm done with your bitchy sister. And I'm done with this fucking relationship."

With this, he storms off.

I heave a sigh of relief but it's shortlived cause the next moment I see Chris on the floor, crying her heart out.

"It's over... he left..." She mutters in between her sobs.

I kneel down beside her, unsure of whether to scold her or to console her. It's a complete mess. All I know is, I can't see my sister like this. I can't.

My eyelids start getting heavy and I remember that I did not take my morning pills. Damn it!

"Chris, you are so much better than that. You can do so much better. He does not deserve someone like you. He does not love you." I say to her.

"No! He loves me. I was always the one making mistakes. Despite all my flaws, he loved me Elena." She replies.

I cant be calm. Not when she is like this. I shake her shoulders. "Snap out of it Christina Alica Bennett! Please..." I can't help the tears that roll down my cheeks.

I hear footsteps from behind me. "She is showing signs of self-blame Elena." Jonathan says.

And suddenly my entire world collapses around me. Self blame, the condition where the victim takes the blame of the stressful situation on herself or himself.

This mentality is caused when from a young age we learn to carry responsibility for things that we weren't our doing. Either by seeing or by experiencing. And given our family history of domestic violence..... It all just makes so much sense now.

"What do I do Jonathan.... what do I do?" I ask, bursting into sobs.

I am not able to keep myself together anymore. I try hard not to, but my eyelids shut without my permission and I fall asleep.

______________________________________

Author's note:

A heartfelt apology to all those who were waiting for so long for an update.

Being a student, it gets difficult for me to be regular, but the requests I got made me work harder and publish this chapter.

I hope you will all be patient with me in the future as well. And once again, I'm sorry for making you wait this long.

P.S. Your thoughts and views are always welcome. Love you!