Breakable (a Wesley Stromberg fan fic)

Fourty Three

Skye's POV

'Beep, beep, beep', the sound of my alarm jolted me from a deep sleep, I had been so tired that thankfully I didn't get much time to get depressed before I fell asleep last night. And I certainly wasn't about to go back to being sad now, I sprang out of bed and hopped in the shower. Sure there was a hollow feeling in my chest and my inner voice constantly reminding me I gave it up for an asshole, but I was convinced today was going to be a good day. Fake it until you make it, that was my motto, I would pretend I was happy until I actually got happy again. I wasn't the first girl Wesley had played and I was sure I wouldn't be the last so I wasn't about to try and win him back or let him see how hurt I was. I always pitied those girls when I saw them following him in the halls, and I didn't want anyone's pity. What I wanted was to get on with things, have some fun in my last few months of high school and put all this Wesley crap behind me. I knew it would be hard seeing him at school every day and the gossip about us breaking up would suck but I just had to ignore it, ignore him, and not let it get to me.

I put on the denim skirt I had bought yesterday with Taylor, I knew it was shorter than was probably appropriate for school but I didn't care at this point. I paired it with a white top Taylor had chosen, the hem of the top stopped a good 2 inches above the waistband of the skirt, which sat low on my hips. I wasn't thrilled with the idea of showing this much skin at school but I tried not to think about it. I felt better once I slipped my feet into my white Vans, more like myself. My hair had dried all wavy so I threw it up in a high pony tail, put on slightly more make up than I usually do for school and headed downstairs. My mom was racing around like usual but stopped when she saw me come into the kitchen and smiled at me. "Making sure he knows what he's missing out on hey?" she said looking me up and down, implying I was trying to look good to rub it in Wesley's face. I shook my head, "Not at all, it was just time for a change" I explained, although maybe she was right. Maybe deep down I was trying to make Wesley regret breaking up with me, though he's seen me naked so I'm not sure how much of an affect a short skirt will have. I hated that some part of me still wanted him to want me, that part of me still wanted him, that I hoped he'd realise he made a mistake. He didn't deserve me to have any nice feelings towards him but somewhere inside me I wanted Wesley back, the Wesley I knew, the amazing guy I loved.

The closer I got to school the more nervous I got and the slower I pedalled, trying to put it off as long as possible. After I locked my bike up I headed towards the main doors into the school, a massive smile spreading across my face when I saw Taylor and Lucy waiting for me. They had waited to walk in with me and I couldn't love them anymore than I did right at this second. Lucy looked me up and down, nodding in approval, "I didn't believe it when Taylor said you let her pick some new clothes for you, but you look hot Skye". I blushed, I didn't feel so hot, I felt like a bit of an idiot who thought an outfit could change her ex-boyfriends douche bag personality. 'Fake it til you make it' my inner voice reminded me, I had to act confidently until I felt confident. I took a deep breath and headed inside, I was grateful that Taylor and Lucy were so chatty because they kept me occupied discussing the most recent elimination on American Idol. I forced the memory of cuddling on the couch each week with Wesley as we watched Idol from my mind and just smiled. I had double gym with Lucy first up so after I dumped some stuff in my locker we headed to the change rooms. It took everything I had not to look over to Wesley's locker as we made our way past it, I had to not care what he was doing or who he was doing it with.

Amber practically cornered me in the change rooms, "I noticed you and Wesley weren't all over each other this morning" she pointed out. I grimaced, we were never all over each other but she was right in her observation that we had no contact this morning which hadn't been the case for the last few weeks. I mentally noted that Wesley hadn't told anyone yet, otherwise Amber would know exactly why we hadn't spoken this morning, I wondered why he hadn't immediately made his single status known. I figured she was a good person to talk to about this, she would no doubt get the gossip going and once everyone in school knew it would be old news and everything would go back to normal. "Yea, we broke up. It just wasn't meant to be I guess", I tried to appear nonchalant about it, even shrugging my shoulders as I spoke. She gave me a fake smile and told me how sorry she was, sounding completely insincere but I didn't care. Mrs Foley gave me the menial task of tidying up the room where the school kept most of it's sports equipment, I was thrilled to be by myself for a bit, pretending to be happy when there's a constant pain in your chest is hard. I knew seeing Wesley would be the worst bit, and as much as I wanted to put it off I assumed it would be much like a bandaid, better to just rip it off and get it over with.