Trust Me (An Islamic Love Story)

Chapter 37

I am overwhelmed with emotions as it has been so long since I last visited the mosque. It looks stunning indeed, piercing the clear sky, but what looks more stunning is how people hurry towards it, men and women.

Azar keeps going on, but when he realizes I am not by his side, he glances over his shoulder and asks, "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," I say, unable to think clearly. "I—umm, I am just very shocked."

When I thought I couldn't be shocked more, Azar gives me a smile —a genuine one. "Abeer, sometimes you can be wrong, and I can be right. Get used to it, angel." He takes out his mobile and texts someone. "I have messaged Ahmed. He will come and pick us up here after Dhur."

"Hmm." I glance at Azar, who is still busy with his mobile, and a weird feeling settles in. Have I been wrong about him? Why is it so hard to digest this truth? Why was I shocked when I found out Azar went to pray and stayed at the Masjid all night? Why can't I get over the fact that he can be a practicing Muslim? Why is it so hard to swallow that he can have sympathy? Do I think I am better than him?

No, I can't. I mustn't.

"He will not enter Hellfire who has the weight of a seed of faith in his heart, and he will not enter Paradise who has the weight of a seed of arrogance in his heart."

I recall the Prophet ( صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم)'s Hadith, and it gives me shivers.

Oh Allah, remove any pride whatsoever from my heart. Ameen.

Today is different. I tell myself. The night was different,. and so was the day. Azar's different. I take a deep breath and stop resisting what I feel. And so, I let it be. So just be. I let myself feel good about going to the mosque with Azar.

As we near the entrance, the Muathin gives the Adhaan. "Allahu Akbar..." And Azar and I part our ways. I remove my shoes and read the dua written on the wall beside the mosque's gate:

"Bismillah wasalatu wasalamu aalai' rasulullah. Allah hummaf tah lee abwaaba rahmatik. (In the Name of Allah and blessing and peace be upon the messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم). O Allah, open before me the doors of Your mercy.)

I enter the mosque with my right foot, the scent welcoming me. I mutter salaam to the women already present. I sit beside an elderly woman, who is doing dhikr. She smiles at me and greets me, and I reply.

I read two nafl upon entering the mosque and four rakahs of Sunnah of Dhur.

Soon the Imam gives the Iqamat, and we all stand up and pray. I feel peace in my heart that I haven't felt in a very long time. The old lady beside me requests me to bring her water, so I fill her a glass from the dispenser and hand it to her.

"Jazakallah Khairun," she mumbles. "May Allah bless you."

"Ameen," I say under my breath, and after giving her a small smile, I leave.

I recite the dua upon leaving the mosque: "Allah humma inni uss aaluka min fadhlikh (O Allah! I indeed ask you of your favor)."

I decide to go to the same place where Azar and I were standing before and find him already waiting there. I see recognition in his eyes when he sees me from a distance, and as soon as I join him, he informs me, "Ahmed will be here in a few minutes."

"Okay."

We watch different people come out of the mosque as we wait, talking among themselves cheerfully. After a few minutes, Azar receives Ahmed's message, and we both have to go to the car as Ahmed parked it away from the mosque.

I sit at the back, and Azar sits in the front with Ahmed. "What happened to your car?" Ahmed asks Azar as he starts driving.

"I have no clue," Azar replies.