𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙢𝙚𝙨𝙨. Evan Buckley ¹

eight

BEAUTIFUL MESS.
chapter eight.

"YEAH, YOU SURE YOU don't want us to stay?" Hunter asked Bobby as she watched him help Buck work the tie to his suit.

"It's okay, Hunt," Bobby said, "you guys have things to do. I don't mind staying. Neither does Chim."

Hunter laughed, "yeah that poor guy would work a whole week full of shifts if you asked."

"He's excited to be back," Bobby defended.

"What if I screw it up?" Buck asked nervously.

"Uh, just don't?" Hunter said but it sounded more like a question, "just be yourself- actually don't do that."

"Um, what happens if we start having sex?"

"Then give her a good time and don't dip after," Hunter shrugged as if it was the most simple thing in the whole world.

"Why would that happen?" Bobby asked.

"Cause I'm a sex addict-"

"Self diagnosed. Listen it's not that big of a deal. Just know a lot of guys use meaningless sex to avoid real intimacy, so don't let that happen."

"So if I'm not a dick about it, I can have sex?"

"I didn't say that," their captain laughed before looking over at the girl, "did I say that?"

"Buckley, try something new. Get to know her. Like really know her," Hunter suggested as she stood up, "also, this is a nice girl. Treat her nice and don't make me hurt you."

"Yeah," Bobby agreed with the girl.

She was officially off the clock and grabbed her bag, bidding her goodbyes as she left. Hunter threw her bag into the bed of her truck before climbing in the drivers seat and quickly taking off. Her first stop was West End Florist Shop. She thanked the cashier as she took the sunflower and yellow rose bouquet that had slight greenery in it. Pacing them in the passenger seat she took off again.

Her next stop was the Los Angeles National Cemetery. It wasn't the most romantic but it was the only spot she could visit Lane at.

Flowers, sunflowers, and a new flag in hand, she walked the ever familiar path towards the gravestone. He had always said he would have wanted to be buried near other veterans. Hunter made sure he had gotten his wish. She stopped and then knelt down as she read the engraving.

Lane Garrett Dunn
October 4th, 1989 — February 17th, 2017
A loved son and a devoted Marine.

Hunter took the old slightly fading flag down and folded it up before placing the new one in the same spot. Next she left the yellow flowers laying across his head stone as she fully sat down, bringing her knees to her chest as she held them with her arms. Her eyes quickly diverted themselves from the sunflower tattoo on her arm that reminded her of him.

"God damn, Lane," she said with a dry chuckle, "never quite know what to say."

Hunter looked at the sky. she could already feel tears building up, just waiting to be release as soon as she delved into all of the unexplored emotions.

"I'm sorry for not coming here sooner, I didn't think I'd be able to face you. But I know you were crazy about celebrating Valentine's Day and I just couldn't miss it," Hunter paused as she looked down at the flowers again, "I remembered the sunflowers. I still don't know how you got them when we were deployed in the middle of fucking Afghanistan but I'll never forget. You handed them to me and you told me all the things your mother had told you about love and how to take heed when things got hard and You then looked at me and handed me the bouquet of sunflowers and said, "you're the sun to me." I swear I would have married you right there given the chance."

"I guess pawn shop diamond rings proves a guy like you could love girl like me."

Hunter paused, pursing her lips as she wipped her eyes. "I'm so sorry, Lane. If I hadn't of been there in Kandahar that day, you might still be alive," Hunter stopped again thinking, he would have most definitely been alive if she hadn't of been there. "And you come from a good place with a happy family. The only bad you've ever done was to see the good in me. You dedicated your life to helping those who got hurt in the field and I spent mine killing people from kilometers away."

Hunter was on the verge of sobbing, barely holding herself together, "I remember that day perfectly," she said, "I was helping ID the bodies and I didn't even recognize you when I turned you over. The .50 cal and burned through, right between the eyes. I didnt want to believe it was you, I saw the dog tags and I still denied it. Donny had to pull me off of you," she whispered the last part, littered with guilt.

"God, I can't do this without you," she said quietly, "I can't keep doing this. Every damn day I wake up and forget you're gone, then it hits me. I remember what i did and suddenly it's like I'm looking down that scope all over again."

She wiped her tears once more, "and then Donny died and I took the bullet to the hip. I really though my that was my end. I fucking hoped it was. But then I woke up, I do everyday and you never do."

"I love you, lane," she whispered and look a long pause, "and I'm so sorry."

Hunter stood up and made her way back to her truck, still wiping the few tears that were left. She softly picked up the dog tags that hung around her mirror and looked at the polaroid picture of her and Lane both in their combat uniforms, smiling wide as they hugged each other. Hunter reached up and felt the two chains on her neck, one held the dog tags and the other had a handmade diamond ring she was given over two years ago. She tucked them back under her LAFD shirt to hide them away from anyone else who would see. It was a miracle that no one at the 118 had seen them. on the moments when she wore low cut shirts, the ring ended up in her pocket.

"I need to shoot something," she mumbled to herself before driving off to grab a pistol and a rifle before heading to a range.

I'm starting this thing we're I'll upload
the next chapter whenever I finish another one
bc I have like 21 written