ch. thirteen

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I was sitting by the fire, my eyes traveling over everyone. This was supposed to be a little get together, but it was looking more like a party.

I took a sip of the beer in my hand, remaining observant. Annie was finally able to join us, so she was talking quietly with Armin, a pink blush flushing his cheeks.

I smiled to myself as I watched his reaction. The closer she got, the more nervous he became. Sasha was chugging some beer with Conny and Jean. I watched Jean, hoping he'd feel my stare. I wanted to talk to him and fix things between us.

"Y/N."

I slightly jumped, looking over and seeing emerald eyes. "Eren."

"Why are you alone?" he peered down at me, tugging off his black jacket.

"I just wanted to be," I shrugged, looking away from him. After a second, he sat down beside me, looking ahead.

"It doesn't make you uncomfortable that I'm talking to you... right?" Eren asked, his voice low.

I fought the urge to look over at him. I interlocked my fingers together and shook my head, "No."

Eren quietly sighed in relief, and I felt our legs graze each other. Neither of us moved -- we kept contact with each other, the warmth of each other's skin pressed together.

No. Don't feed into it.

I moved my leg away from him, and I saw the disappointment flash across his face.

"I did something to upset you," Eren slightly frowned, turning his body to me. I stayed focused on the people in front of me.

"I didn't say I was upset."

Eren sighed, "But you are."

"Okay, Eren. You're right. I am upset. And for good reason. But if you can't even realize why, then that's just fucking sad," I shook my head.

"Y/N, I'm trying here. Can't you see that?" Eren ran a hand over his face. I could see the irritation in his green eyes.

Yeah, almost ten years too late.

"I don't wanna argue with you Eren," I sighed, looking over at him.

Eren froze, staring at me with his brows furrowed. Then his eyes widened, "No, Y/N, that's not what I'm trying to do," he frowned.

"But it's all we ever do."

Eren looked away from me, "Not lately."

"And why's that?" I asked, flicking my eyes over to him.

He held my gaze, never looking away. Time slowly felt like it was fading, like we were all alone. Our focus was on each other and only each other. I saw his eyes land on my lips, then remained on my eyes once again.

"Because I'm-,"

"Y/N!" Sasha yelled, interrupting Eren. "Come have a drink with me!"

I looked at her as she waved me over, and I gave Eren an apologetic smile. I didn't know whether to be happy or not over the fact my conversation with him got cut short. What was he going to say?

"I see you getting cozy with Eren," Sasha smirked once I reached her.

I rolled my eyes, "No way. He's just trying to be friendly. But... I don't know if I should forgive him that easily. He made these past years a hell for me, honestly."

"He's trying to make up for that!" she whispered loudly, her brown eyes big.

I shrugged, shaking away the thoughts of him. "It doesn't matter. I'm done entertaining it. His apology was shitty anyways."

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