The Offering

Chapter Two - Daella

Raine grips my hand tightly as he walks beside me as we make our way into the village centre, his tiny hand wrapping around my fingers.

The walk into the village is a short one, the village itself wasn't overly large, most of the houses were spread out around it with farms attached and they littered the hillside and reached to the edge of the forest taking up as much room as we were given.

"Evie, how good to see you!" Maureen calls out with a wave as we reach the village. She is standing among a small group of women near the village well and I have the urge to turn the other way, to hide, to do anything to avoid this meeting.

"Maureen, Sage, Agnes, it's nice to see all of you as well." My mother smiles happily, clearly unaware of my discomfort.

"And you as well Daella, we were just speaking about you." Maureen smiles at me and I am filled with unease as I reach their small group. Nothing good could come from having the local gossips talking about me. "Sage said there are a few young men planning to visit soon from a neighbouring village, they are looking for wives. And you are the only young woman of marrying age still unmarried in the village so we thought it would be good for you to meet them, finally find yourself a husband." She smiles excitedly and I internally grimace, anger bubbles inside me at her words, at her ideas, like I was in desperate need of a husband because I was so old. I am nineteen, not thirty five. Yes I may be the last woman of marrying age still unmarried but I didn't see that as a bad thing, quite the opposite.

"No thank you, I am happily unmarried and intend to stay that way." I smile sweetly, doing my best to hide the anger and venom in my words.

My mother laughs nervously. "Oh she's only joking!" She smiles brightly. "I heard the same thing from Deidre." She joins in their conversation and I take a step back, and another, no longer wanting to listen to them plan my life for me or speak about my future prospects.

I pick up Raine and set him on my hip walking him to the well needing to get away from their scheming.

I could practically feel my mother planning my wedding behind me, picking my future husband and our children's names.

She was so convinced that this life would make me happy, that I would somehow change and want the same things and all I truly wanted was for her to see me for me, for her to understand that the life she imagines for me is not the life I want.

She claimed she had once felt as I do now, that she wanted freedom and adventure but I don't see that when I look at her. I see a mother and a wife and nothing more. It only fills me with dread.

I look around our small familiar village, glancing at the few stores offering various wares and the local pub that the men would visit to supposedly let off steam. I look at the town hall, the tallest building in our village and find the large brass bell hanging from the top point. It only rang on rare occasions, like if there was a fire, or enemies, or an urgent town meeting.

If you heard the bell ringing it always meant something bad was happening.

I imagine there is a bell in my mind and right now it is ringing like crazy. The constant sound echoes inside of me warning me of the danger, telling me find safety, to fill buckets with water, to ready weapons, to do something to prevent the danger from taking your life.

But what could I do? Despite the warning bell I was stuck standing, waiting to face the unavoidable danger alone and unprepared.

As I set the table for dinner, Ruth and Winnow play with Raine on the floor near the fireplace and mum stands stirring the casserole over the stove.

The door opens and Tully, Ryder and Dad walk in, expressions exhausted, faces covered in dirt and sweat streaks.

"Welcome home." Mother smiles happily, stepping up to father and taking his coat from him.

Dad grunts in reply and I turn away, picking up the spoons and setting them on the table. If this was mother's idea of love I wanted no part of it.

Raine realises who is home and stands up with a squeal and cries out "Daddy!" running towards him.

Dad smiles and picks Raine up, tossing him into the air as Raine lets out another happy squeal. While I am glad he could muster a genuine smile for Raine, I wished he could find one for mum too, she deserved something.

Tully and Ryder collapse into their seats at the dinner table, looking far older than either of them were. Tully would be eighteen soon and it would be his turn to find a wife, I didn't want to think about it, he wasn't old enough to be a husband. Ryder wouldn't be far behind his brother and I watch as he runs a hand through his shaggy ginger hair and all I can see is my little brother, not a husband.

"Dinner time!" Mother calls out making me start as I stand staring at my brothers. She carries over the pot of casserole and sets it on the table.

I grab the loaf of bread we baked earlier and set it on the table beside the casserole.

I watch as everyone else takes their seats and mum and me are the last to sit down. Everyone starts serving themselves, quiet chatter begins as the girls start talking about their day and I sit waiting for everyone else to have full bowls.

The casserole tastes the same as it always did, slightly watered down to make it stretch and there is never enough left over after everyone else has their serve to fill me up but I don't complain because mum never complains. I doubt anyone would listen even if either of us did.

As I sit on my lumpy bed later that night, Ruthlyn and Winnow asleep in their shared bed. I hold onto my book by the flickering candlelight, pages worn out and dog eared from reading it over and over.

I delve into the story, willing it to help me forget about my mother's plans, or her words of advice. I imagine myself in the hero's place, standing at the top of a hill overlooking the ocean, a small town in the distance, a jetty full of sail boats and trading ships waiting to take me anywhere I want to go.

There would be no men to tell me what to do, no house to keep clean, no meals to cook, no children to keep safe and fed, no husband to serve.

Just myself and my freedom and the world at my feet.

I could do it. I know I could. It might be difficult at first, but I could learn as I go. I could learn to hunt and live in the forest and take care of myself.

I would miss my family, I would miss my mum, but what was the alternative? Wait here for some "just barely" man to show up and choose me and become my mother. Well a worse version of my mother.

Gods I could see it now, see that life, see the monotony and the routine and the loneliness. I could see myself pregnant while two more children hover at my feet crying and demanding and constantly needing. Then my husband would come home and I would be forced to balance the roles of mother and wife and answer to more demands more needs.

My life wouldn't even be my own. I would live only to serve others. I would have no choices, no freedom, just endless chores and responsibility.

How could I give myself to that life? How could I just sit back and watch it unfold and not do something?

I slam my book closed, no longer interested in its words or the story, because that's all it was and all it would ever be.