The Alpha's Underworld Princess

She's Asleep

Valkyrie

Kassandra was finally asleep, which meant I could get up. Everything hurt as I moved. She was not great in this body. I was also starved and dehydrated. She needed to keep up on this. I'm not sure she can recognize when my body is hungry like she can her own. Or she didn't care. Being as stressed as she was the adrenaline could be messing with her appetite.

Slowly walking into the kitchen, I saw Anthony had come back. He was sleeping on the couch, one leg dangling off the side, foot on the floor, and the other out straight. His one hand was a pillow. He had been reading something, and the book was dropped on his face, gripped by his other hand. I laughed at the picture.

I walked over to him as quietly as I could and moved the book to the table. It was a baby book. He had finished it up to the labor part. I smiled about it but then started to cry. This wasn't fair. Now that Kassandra was sleeping, I could command him to leave. We should figure this out on our own if that was our decision. Well, Kassandra's decision, but whatever. What she was doing to him wasn't fair. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. Not yet.

It wasn't easy to do with the width of the couch, but I climbed over him to lay down, resting my head on his chest and listening. My heartbeat slowly started to match his.

"You okay, Love?" He asked me, still half asleep.

"Now I am," I whispered, and he wrapped his arms around me.

"You should be sleeping. It's late." Absent-mindedly, he stroked my hair.

"Kassandra keeps forgetting to eat," I told him. "I don't think she notices the hunger cues."

"Fuck. Okay." When he started to get up, I stopped him, crying. "Can we just stay here for a little while?"

My request startled him, but he said, "Sure."

"She said I can be awake at night, and I'm not sure I want to waste my freedom on eating." Then I started to feel guilty about lying there like that with him. Not even necessarily because of Wyatt. But because I was holding Anthony here, stopping his life. He cannot go against my requests, even if he wants to. I tried again to form the words to command him away, but I didn't want to. I selfishly wanted him here. For the first time, I was afraid to be alone.

"The baby book says you should be gaining more weight, though." He picked it up and flipped to the page with this chart. "I do not think you are on schedule. And it should be probably a little between these two."

"You really read all that?"

"I'll be honest with you, Val, I don't know anything about pups. I was three when Richard was born. I only remember holding him after he was born and getting my mom a diaper when her hands were full. Occasionally, I helped in the nursery but mostly just held the orphaned pups. Amiee was done having pups by the time I moved to Dark Moon. So... how else am I supposed to learn?"

"It's not fair that she is doing this, but I'm not strong enough to stop her. Especially right now."

He kissed the top of my head. "Don't worry about it. Please don't hit me for saying it, but you will be weaker pregnant. All your energy is going towards making the pup, and Kassandra isn't doing any of the work. Of course, that's not in this baby book, but it is a thing. Wolves take over their humans a lot during this time. Add the fear... it's better for you and the pup if you don't fight it too hard. It'll exhaust you."

"I'm always exhausted these days."

"Why you need to eat then."

"You really should go, Anthony." As I said it, I hugged him tighter. "She's manipulating you, so you'll stay. She knows you won't leave me alone. You have a life, and I can't keep getting in the way of it. I know y-" Then I stopped. He couldn't know I felt it. Him with the other women. It's too weird. I grabbed his arm. "I don't even know what this is." I traced the pattern. "I'm so sorry."

"Not sure I can be mad. Being connected to you makes me stronger." He smiled warmly at me. "Hard to not appreciate that gift, don't you think?"

"I'm afraid it's more than that," I said. "Can you... feel..."

Anthony

My mouth went dry as she ran her fingers over the mark on my arm. It felt so good, so calming. I don't know if she realized she was doing it, but I was very aware. I never wanted her to stop touching it and needed her to all at the same time. I'm unsure I could keep myself from doing something I shouldn't if she didn't stop.

She looked up at me and finally let my arm drop. I brushed her hair back behind her ear and fought to find the strength to look away from her. My breath quickened when I leaned my forehead on hers. "Val, I-"

My lips were so close to hers. One move, and I would feel them again. But I held my position firm and listened to her breathing. It was quick, erratic. Did she feel the same thing I did? The magnetic pull that was a struggle to keep at bay? Or was it all in my head?

As I massaged her cheek, she drifted asleep. For hours, I stared at her, and Xander kept begging me to let her remember, to tell her the truth, that here it would be okay if I did. No one else was around. We could talk. Block the memory again if that makes sense to do, but at least we would know. Would she choose a different path if she knew?

But in her vulnerable state, I couldn't be selfish. She needed me to be here as her friend, protector, and beta, not someone who would cause more harm.

"This is... wrong." I leaned down and kissed her stomach, putting my hand over the same spot protectively. "H-he should be mine. You should be."

I fucked up hard, and there was no way to take it back now. But I swore I had some memory of a past life. In that past life, things were different.

'They were Anthony. I tried to tell you. This is wrong. This is all a mistake. The pup is mine. He is supposed to be.' I pulled her towards me, and she rolled over to face me, sighing in her sleep.

I prayed to the Moon Goddess, Just let me pretend. Pretend it means something. Pretend she's mine. Pretend he is mine.

I saw this mark on her inner thigh when she shifted in my arms in the moonlight. I gently moved her leg to get a better look at it, and I froze. In the exact spot where I had bit her that night was... something shimmering on her skin.

'Xander!?'

'I-I don't know... why... I don't know what that is. It doesn't look like a mating mark. Maybe she got a tattoo?'

 'In the exact spot that we bit her!?' It was dangerously close to Blood Moon's mark. The full moon, dripping blood onto a wolf and a woman, was wrapped in his embrace. But even if I left this behind, I was no longer part of the pack. Being beta forfeited my title to the pack. Unless I gave up being beta, I could not hold that title. This is different from what it would look like if I marked someone.

'Maybe it is. How could we know until we mark someone?' Xander asked me, and I told him I didn't know. I knew nothing anymore.

When I touched it, I felt like someone shocked me.

Closing my eyes, I felt myself start to cry. What did I ever do to deserve this? Watching my best friend be with my mate? And she was. I didn't care what anyone thought or said. Be damned whatever fate might tell me someday.

"Something is wrong?" Val whispered to me as she stretched. "You look like someone died. Did something happen at home?"

"No. Everything is fine. Come eat, okay? You fell asleep."

"Right. Kassandra forgot again. It's why I came out here."

"Of course she did." I pulled her up, needing to break out of the cocoon we created. She groaned as we headed into the kitchen. "You are trying to fatten me up for the slaughter. I know it."

"Only you could see eating that way." I turned to the refrigerator, and she watched me intently.

"Thank you. I know she doesn't say it enough, but... I'm glad you are here." She pushed the food around on the plate I put before her.

"I'm not sure I'd rather be anywhere else." Her smile was all I needed to feel better.