Remorse and Regrets

Chapter 42

As her thumb caressed the sweater, Dhriti couldn't stop the bombardment of the memories.

It has been years to the incident that her tears had dried up but pain refused to subside.

It was not just the crashing of the dreams but hope that had shook her very foundation.

Over the years everyone advised her to move on.....

Moving on is still easy, it is the healing that is difficult.

" Badi Mamma...."

The high pitched scream brought Dhriti out of her thoughts.

She turned to the glimmer of sunshine in their life. If ever she was able to forget the bitter past,even for a moment, it was only and only because of her.

As Gauravi flung herself into her arms, Dhriti's face broke out into the first genuine smile in the past 24 hours.

" Badi Mamma....my drawing"

Her excitement was over the roof as she showed Dhriti her drawing.

It took her a better part of the day to draw this but her Reva Dadi had told her that this would make her Badi Mamma happy and she wanted to make her Badi Mamma smile.

But as soon as Dhriti's eyes fell on the paper, she lost her smile.

The baby cuddled in her arm in the picture ,pinched her heart badly.

But keeping her hurt aside, Dhriti tried to smile so as not to dissapoint the little girl.

But she didn't realize how wrong she was. Her baby girl was more perceptive than any 4 year old.

" What happened, baby girl?" Dhriti asked noticing the sudden frown on Gauravi's face.

"Why are you sad, Badi Mamma?"

Gauravi in turn asked surprising Dhriti.

"Nahi tho.... Why should I be sad, Bachha?"

"I don't know that but YOU ARE SAD" she replied adamantly

"Whenever you smile, the corners of your eyes crinkle but it didn't today"

Astonishment would be a small word to describe what Dhriti was feeling.

She couldn't believe this little girl to notice her little nuances.

Overwhelmed, Dhriti pulled Gauravi for a massive hug. The pain that had started somewhere were ebbing away.

" Bataona Badi Mamma.... Why were you sad? Kisine datta....Bade Papa ne datta?"

The last words uttered conspiratorially with shock brought a chuckle out of Dhriti.

She has really become Niranjan's Princess who couldn't believe her Simba could ever be wrong.

" Nahi....tumhare Bade Papa ne nahi daata" Dhriti assured her with a smile

" Tho phir?" She asked curious

Gauravi was not one to leave matter unaddressed.  She was on a mission to find what made her Badi Mamma sad.

While Dhriti was lost for words on how to explain to this little girl.... She cannot and won't rob her of her innocence.

But the next words she heard, raised fury in her like no other.

"I don't like seeing you sad. Reva Dadi told me you would be happy seeing this drawing but it only made you even more sadder...What should I do to make you happy?"

With pouted lips , she looked at Dhriti sadly.

A lump formed in Dhriti's throat but at the same time she felt disgusted for calling that woman Maa who was not beneath using the emotions of a kid to satisfy her ego.