Not A Chance

Chapter 13 - Closets, guns and hydrants

Peter watched in terror as Wade slowly drew his gun out of the holster and inched closer towards the closet. "I know you're there."

What now, what now, what now?

Peter asked himself as he looked around for something, anything he could use to hide his face. It was too dark to see anything though.

"Come out. I know it's hard but it's okay."

He patted the floor, only finding shoes and a single sock, a dirty one judging by the smell of it. "Ew." He whispered.

"Show your true colors, let the world know you're proud of who you are."

Peter was too busy trying to keep his secret identity secret to pay any attention to Wade's nonsense. His heart skipped a beat when he heard Deadpool stop right in front of the closet, it was then when he picked up something that felt...familiar. He touched and stretched it, making sure it was what he thought it was. Bingo! A mask! He wasted no time and put it on quickly and just in time because Deadpool opened both closet doors and before he could even look up he felt the muzzle of a semi-automatic pistol pressed against his head. 

Deadpool laughed upon seeing his mask on Peter. "Oh cruel irony!"

Peter gulped again. "Wade..."

The other man stopped laughing immediately. "You know my name..." He pointed out in such a threatening way it sent shivers down Peter's spine.

"It's me..." He was afraid to move because, again, Wade's unstable and impulsive. "It's Spider-Man."

Wade remained silent before bursting out in laughter. Okay yeah he understood how it could be hard to believe. Spider-Man was at Wade's place voluntarily? And not only that but the way he was dressed made him look like some kid who thought it'd be fun to break into somebody's house after doing drugs, rather than the very mature man Deadpool probably thought he was. "That was so funny I almost feel bad knowing I have to kill you!" The merc kept laughing and pretended to wipe a tear away.

Peter saw this as his chance to prove he was telling the truth. He quickly got up and jumped, doing a backflip and using Wade's shoulders as support to get behind him. When he landed he kicked him into the closet before shooting a web at his gun and snatching it out of his hands. "I'm either telling the truth or a cosplayer on a tight budget. You choose."

Wade stared at him in silence for a moment, then looked at the gun in the hero's hand and up at the mask again. "Only Spider-Man would say a joke as bad as that one."

"Wasn't the web a little more convincing than the joke?"

Deadpool got up and shrugged. "Kind of, but the joke was definitely the cherry on top."

Peter chuckled quietly, shaking his head. "Sorry about the mask." He said as he grabbed his own. He turned around so Deadpool couldn't see his face and took off the leather mask before putting his back on.

"It's okay, Spidey. It looks better on you anyway." Wade looked at the many things on the bed. "What're you doing here anyway?"

Peter looked at him, noticing he was staring at the stuff on the mattress. "Oh I-I kinda um...borrowed your- you see I had to go and I was late so I couldn't go back home and I thought I'd borrow your clothes, which by the way look very baggy on me I felt like-"

"I get it! I get it." Wade picked up the clothes, then smirked upon seeing the sweatpants.

Peter noticed. "What?"

"Well Spidey." He showed him the back of the sweatpants, the word 'smexy' written in pink decorated the butt area...all of it. "This is what I call a wise outfit choice." He carelessly threw the clothes in the closet. "Let me tell you, those with fishnet tights underneath look killer." He took the mask Spidey had and did the same with it. "I'm sure pink high heels would go with it too but they never have my size."