Betray Me Softly

29: Falling for Him

-A little too late...A little too delusional-

Lina

I knew I had to be careful, that there could be wild animals and traps easily picking me as their easy preys, but I needed to see if Kivanc hadn't got harmed. Now among the thick canopy of the Nathia Gali forest, I shivered with uncertainty. Weaponless and alone are not a wise combination. But, I was desperate...anxious.

My worry for Kivanc was also confusing me so much, especially when I was furious at him, but I still continued searching...rushing towards the last place I had last seen Kivanc.

There were bushes shifting beside me. I felt so terrified by the looming trees, and the distant sound of growls-that akin close to the sound of lions-had me shaking. I had to find Kivanc. Now. The forest wasn't a place to idly roam around.

The resounding sound of my slap tortured my heart again. Somehow, I didn't like the feeling of fighting with Kivanc...having him so mad at me. He was angry. It hurt that his promises had been filled with lies...it hurt that he was choosing some 'Zara', yet despite his betrayal, I didn't want him to get hurt. He had to be safe.

The silent echoes of shadows lingering in the air scared me, but I didn't let them get to me as I anxiously walked across wilted leaves and searched for my husband. A deep sense of dread was hitting my heart at the thought of never finding him again. The pain of such a thing happening almost had me breathless. Where could he go?

After a half-hour walk, I found myself lost in the depths of the Nathia Gali forest, yet still, there were no signs of Kivanc. Did he go back? Was he still in the forest? I had no idea. Yet, the thought of going back without him, had my heart feeling overwhelmed with anxiety. He had to be safe.

The shadows and bushes around me had turned wickedly silent. The shades of the trees, the looming branches, had me folding my arms in terror and self-defence. I was constantly eyeing my surroundings to pick on any signs of wild animals or danger, yet this part of the forest filled with sun rays seemed safe. The trickling sound of a waterfall from somewhere far was enough to soothe my heart.

Suddenly, I heard a shifting from the bushes on my right side. The lowly snarl emerged which immediately had me yelping and rushing further into the depths of the forest. I felt myself growing extremely vulnerable, and I knew that I soon would have to return back, or I would never be able to find my way back home.

My behaviour and determination were confusing my own soul. I shouldn't bother about a man who was planning to make a complete fool of me. I shouldn't dread the fact of never having him smile at me again, but the loss of his smiles was just too heavy.

Tense and overwhelmed, I continued rushing down some wide and empty paths, with tears of horrible thoughts and fears brimming in my eyes and finally found my heart get filled with an overwhelming air of relief.

Kivanc...I found him walking several feet away from me, with his head lowered. He had his back towards me and was walking away from me. Immediately picking up my pace, I began calling out his name in desperation.

"Kivanc!" In my haste to catch him, I tripped over a loose root on the way and was on my knees, yet I didn't feel the heat of the pain, as I was now crying with the overwhelming relief of seeing Kivanc now anxiously turn around and look at me.

"Lina! Are you okay!" He was by my side in a minute, patting away my loose locks of hair in concern, as he desperately tried to figure out what was going on. I was trying to cover my sounds with my hand, but just the overwhelming tension, and then the relief of finally finding him...it had my nerves weakened.

"I w-was looking for you," I tried to calm myself. It was insane. I was acting so irrationally and being so ridiculous. I shouldn't be crying like this.