Luna Awakened

17. The Decision

I told Coby through our mind link that I would wait for him in his cabin. I am so shaken by Jake's words. My mind is racing with all these questions I can't answer. What will the pack do if Coby isn't their Alpha? Will the new Alpha be good to them or a total nightmare? Will Coby hate me when I leave? Will I be able to stay away from him after I leave? Lately the pull I feel towards him has been growing stronger every day.
I decide to take a hot shower to relax my tense muscles. The bathroom is steaming and the glass shower door is fogged. I don't know how long I've been in here but I lift my fingers to my face and they are all wrinkly so I know I've been here a while. I sigh out loud and then I hear the glass door open behind me. My body freezes, I was so in my head I didn't sense him until just now and his masculine scent hits me so hard I almost can't control myself. I slowly turn around not caring that we are naked. He is looking at me with so much hunger in his eyes. I'm staring at him with fire in mine.  I openly stare at his tall lean muscled body and watch the water cascade down his six pack. My body immediately feels like it's on fire even with the water hitting my back. I bring my eyes back to his face and I can tell he's been checking me out too. Then I snap out of it as anger fills me. Who does he think he is coming in here without my permission! I snap at him.
"Just because we slept together once doesn't give you the right to invade my privacy!" I practically spit in his face
His faces warps to one of shock, like I've just slapped him. He quickly recovers and takes a step closer and leans over to whisper in my ear "so you were just fulfilling my one request then?"
I don't answer but instead nod my head slowly up and down trying to control my breathing. I'm afraid if I answer I'll give myself away. I don't know why I'm doing this. Maybe it's because I feel like I have no control over my life and I just want some kind of control. He steps back and this time he allows me to see how much my words just hurt him. He looks so defeated and then he leans in again and says "thank you for being honest". He steps back again "I can't believe I've just lost everything over someone who isn't even worth my loyalty". He quickly steps out of the shower. I stay there with this intense pain in my chest. I start to hyperventilate, I feel like I can't breathe. I start gasping for air and turn the water off and quickly stumble out of the shower. I grab a towel off the rack and will myself to calm down and steady my breathing. After a few minutes I wipe the mirror to see my face. I'm such an idiot, we are supposed have our ceremony tomorrow and get bonded or imprinted or whatever they call it and now I'm afraid he won't even show. I get dressed and walk out and just as I thought he's gone. I stay up for hours waiting on him but he never comes back. Eventually I fall asleep, I don't go looking for him because somehow I know where he will be or who with.
I wake up to an empty room surprised that no one has come to get me up. I thought these things took time to prepare. I wash up and head towards the mess hall. To my surprise it's empty. What the heck is going on.
I go looking for Nina and I find her standing outside the council room doors with her ear pressed to the huge double doors. She sees me and waves me over. She puts her finger to her mouth silently telling me to stay quiet. I instinctively place my ear against the other door facing her. The voices on the other side sound mumbled but I can make out some words. Jake is speaking and what I hear him say nearly crushes me.