Park Jimin Imagines

He Struggles To Cope With The Pressure Of Being An Idol

The slam of the door followed by the loud scream were the only signs you needed to know Jimin was home. You shut your laptop off, climbing out of your bed, walking to your front door.

There he sat, laid out on the sofa, head buried in a cushion, legs kicking at the arm of the chair. Cautiously you approached him, running your hand over the top of his head. "Baby," you whispered, "are you okay?"

Slowly he sat up, reaching out for your hand in his. As soon as he felt your touch he pulled you onto his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist. "I can't do it anymore, it's all becoming too much."

"Do what? Jimin I don't understand." Terrible thoughts went through your mind, was he talking about you? Work? Friends? You were clueless. "Let me help you, tell me what's wrong so I can try and make it better."

"BTS. It's just getting so crazy and busy and I can't cope with it all. I don't know what day of the week it is anymore, I'm either on stage or in an interview, or a meeting, when do I get the chance to be Park Jimin?"

You sighed, brushing your hand along the side of his face, cupping his slightly swollen cheek. He'd overworked himself, and you knew it, the signs were all there. He had small bags under his eyes where he had hardly slept, his bones were becoming frailer from the lack of food intake, not to mention how often his voice broke from all the singing he had done.

"You can always be Park Jimin around me, I'm always here." You pressed a soft kiss to the tip of his nose, feeling his head come down to rest on your shoulder. "Can you talk to anyone? You know you can't give up on Bangtan, not now."

"Why?" He cried out. "Why not? Why can't I just tell them I've had enough. If this is the life that comes with being an idol then I don't want it."

Your heart was breaking seeing him crumble before you, he'd had small struggles before, but once had he ever threatened to quit before.

"Don't say that, your words hurt, not just the millions of fans you have around the world, but me too. You've worked so hard, I'm not prepared to sit back and let you give up on all your dreams because you're having a bad day."

"It's not just a bad day jagi, I've been feeling like this for weeks."

You brought his face up to look at you, studying him closely. His eyes were beginning to water, his bottom lip quivering as he struggled to hold in all his emotions any longer.

"You know I will always be there no matter what you do, but please think about what you're saying right now. I know it hurts, and I know it's hard, but the fans need you, those other seven members need you."

"I don't even know what I'm saying, this is the thing. I've got so many thoughts and confusions, things just seem like such a blur right now."

You sat and you listened, brushing the hair out of his face as he got himself all worked up, preparing yourself to let him back down.

"Do you remember when Hobi threatened to leave all those years ago, how much you all rallied around him, and now we sit and listen to him talk about how thankful he is to have changed his mind, I don't want you to make the wrong choice. You said to me that Bangtan wouldn't be Bangtan without Hobi, and that still apples to you Jimin."

"I don't think I want to leave," he whispered, "I'm just all over the place. You're right, I've worked too hard to give it all up."

He glanced up at you, a single tear rolling down his cheek which you quickly wiped away. He was at his breaking point, this was exactly what he needed to revaluate everything and figure out all the positive things in his life once again.

"I know things are hard, and a lot of pressure comes with what you do. It's okay to cry Jimin, it only makes you human, which I think is something you need right now."

And then he fell. Tears streamed down his face as you held him close, holding him closely as sobs escaped, dampening the material of your shirt.

"It's all going to be alright sweetheart, just let it all go and you'll feel much better, I promise."

You waited patiently until his tears slowed, his grip on you loosened, his head coming back up to look at you. Just by looking at him you could see how much happier he seemed, tears were needed to bring Jimin back to you.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, staring down into his lap.

"Don't. Don't apologise, you have nothing to be sorry for. You are one of the strongest human beings I know, not many people would be able to do what you do, cope like you do, live like you do."

"I realise now that I've just let everything get to me, I've kept everything trapped because I was scared to show weakness, I didn't want anyone to think any less of me."

Your hands cupped his cheeks, thumbs brushing the slightly red skin. "No one would think less of you, especially not me, I'm so proud of you, Park Jimin, all I want is for you to be okay, I want you to smile everyday and enjoy what you do and love the people around you, it wouldn't matter if you were an idol, a doctor or anything else, it's just you."

"I can't imagine life without you sometimes, all the things you do for me, all the times you're there for me. If I wasn't able to come home to you tonight I don't know what state I would be in, it's you that keeps me sane."

"You do that yourself."

"But I don't. You're the one I turn to whenever I need love and support because I can always count on you, no matter what. There's no one else in this world, it's always been you, dealing with the long distance, heavy nights, stressful times, only you."

You chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to his slightly chapped lips, "you know why I do all of that?"

"Because your crazy?"

Your laughter grew as you shook your head, pressing your forehead against his. "No, silly, I do it because I love you, and I'd sacrifice anything for you, I want to see you happy, I want to be your happiness."

"You always have been, and you always will be, I love you so damn much. Thank you for just being you."