A bizarre family 2.0

Weird/crack Chapter

A stand user had got you back in time, it was around the time Jonathan and Dio were fighting

You just fell from some stairs and you crushed on the floor

".... Who's the kid?" dio asked, you looked at him, he was just a head!

"why are you just a head?!?" you asked him

"because I'm planning on stealing his body!" he said as those things from his neck pointed at Jonathan, what was those things?... Arteries? Who the fuck cares, not me

"ohh!! Yeah, that's why I'm here, from preventing you from doing that!" you said, they all looked at you confused

"and who are you?" dio asked

"my name is (y/n) and I'm 5 years old, I was born in Cairo Egypt, my birth father is you but Jonathan joestar is also my biological father since you stole his body, in 1988 you died and I moved to Japan and stayed with your enemy. I live a pretty normal life there unlike the one I had when I lived with you. Seriously this place was just a place where many orgys took place, I should of listened to Jotaro when he told me that you were a manwhore. Anyways, I'm here because I need to prevent you from killing him" you said, your speech was unlike others, even David bowie with his weird hand fetish didn't match your level, well you didn't know him yet but whatever.

"I don't care if you're my child, but he needs to die and so do you" he said, he tried to kill you but he failed!

You then took those arteries or whatever they were and wrapped them around his face and then tied them into a bow, and since they worked as his legs or whatever he couldn't move, so you took the opportunity and and kicked his head it went straight into the fire and he slowly burned, you then turned to Jonathan and erina

"get in that coffin if you want to live bitches!" you said and they stayed still anc confused

"GET IN THAT COFFIN UNDER 5 SECONDS OR YOU'LL FIND HIM UNDER YOUR BED!" you said, they screamed like little girls and got in the coffin and looked at you as you slowly faded

"since he's dead I won't exist... Fucking finally! Did you know how hard it was to live? Living is hard" you said and then looked at them with a serious face

"adios bitches" you said and you disappeared

"that was my half child? What was wrong with her?" Jonathan asked in a heavy bri'ish accent

"she also had dio as her father... At least they're both gone now" Erina said with a shrug, they looked at each other and smiled, they then leaned in for a kiss, Jonathan stopped and closed the coffin and the ship exploded, they then kissed in the coffin.

After that they were Rescued they lived happily ever after and you never existed