Coming Home (BoyxBoy)

Aftermath

Noah's POV

I watched the car get as small as a dot and believe me the irony wasn't lost on me. Many years ago I had driven away from my best friend so now it was only fitting that he did the same to me.

The wind picked up, sending gusts of what felt like shards of glass against my skin. I wanted to snuggle in the bed I was given but I feared I didn't have enough desire to ever awake again.
~

"Mornings begin early," I nearly smacked my uncle reflexively but he caught my hand. Blowing right past the assault he continued, "Jason says you should get primped and ready before you spar with him. You'll do that once in the morning and evening with lessons with Gramps in between."

Uncle Flynn looked at me carefully but shook his head. "Minnie might have something to take care of your face."

"What? I croaked. Uncle Flynn pointed to the vanity mirror to the left of the bed. I went up to it and burst out laughing at my reflection. My eyes were so puffy from crying myself to sleep they were practically welded shut. The tightness I felt around my eyes made sense.

The hollow sound of my laughter continued longer than was comfortable. I raked a hand through my hair and willed myself to stop before it turned to sobbing.

"I don't know how these sort of relationships go," uncle Flynn waved his hands, ambiguously referring to me being gay, "but that hurt you're feeling, you have to use it."

It dawned on me that it was the first time I didn't recoil at the suggestion that I was gay. I nodded and tried to contort my face into something that looked hopeful and finally Uncle Flynn left.

Yes, Nate was my focus for a week and some change but wrapped up in those moments we spent together were years of friendship and what ifs. I couldn't just get over that. When I had finally seen what we could be it disappeared like a short lived illusion.

Who the fuck could blame me for wanting to process that alone. So I did until Minnie slapped a cold eye mask onto my face.

"Your aura is ruining the ambiance of my kitchen," the grey haired woman stood with one hand on her hip.

"Sorry I just..."

"I know. Here's the thing, I get that Nate was the first person you romantically started to care about but he shouldn't be the last. Work hard and get your mind away from him."

Did everyone know my heart was breaking? I sighed, this felt more than just heartbreak though. It was more than that, Nate made it okay to be gay. If I had him, being myself didn't seem so bad.

Minnie put a green smoothie in front of me and smiled. Just like that she was back to ignoring me to finish making lunch. I inspected the drink. When I found the courage to taste it, I was surprised by how good it was.

The tall glass was finished by the time Jason appeared. Black under armour covered his muscular frame, matching the clothes Uncle Flynn had left in my room. It was the first time I'd seen Jason under the bright lights of the kitchen and I was surprised to find that he had different colored eyes, one bright blue and the other brown.

"Let's go," I looked at martha and she nodded grabbing the glass.

I followed Jason out passed the main door and  into the cold and then he started running.

It didn't take long to realize that I should follow him. I fell behind almost immediately and struggled to just keep him in sight. I was never the athletic type, but it was obvious that that was going to have to change. Apparently, saving your race from their impending annihilation required the ability to do cardio.

My lungs were on fire as cold air seemed to scorch them. Jason hadn't looked back at me once and I'd lost track of how far we'd come so I opted to distract myself.

The woods surrounding the compound was filled with wildlife. It was peaceful running on the trail that seemed to cut through the trees like they were butter. Ma would have loved it here and now I knew why she chose to move to the mountain, because home looked a lot like the compound.

I nearly ran into Jason because I was so distracted. We had stopped at a clearing pretty deep into the woods. I realized that this would be the perfect place to get killed. I didn't judge myself for the anxiety I felt. Maybe that attack had more than just a physical impact.

"Forty sit ups, two sets of twenty lunges, two sets of 10 burpees..." the list went on and I died a little inside.

I don't know what gave Jason the idea that I was athletic, but he didn't even wait for me to complain or offer excuses. He was on the ground right after he finished telling me the exercises.

After I saw death in that clearing we ran back. My body was annihilated by the time Jason let me rest. Jason grunted that I had twenty minutes as if catching a breather was an annoyance.

I definitely didn't make it through all those exercises. At some point my pushups looked more like liedowns. To his credit though, Jason let me do what I could while still urging me to push myself.

I retreated to the common area and I decided to turn on my cell phone.

It was like a foreign brick in the palm of my hand from another world and time. It hadn't been on since I arrived in Addington but I knew I had to face it at some point. I powered the device on.

The thing lit up with notification after notification. For a minute or two all it did was load notifications. I took the time to delete the useless ones and then came the text messages.

Noah, I'm sorry that I wasn't more understanding. You have to understand that I hate that Martha died on our wedding day and I don't think I was wrong for feeling that way. Please call me.

I'm not going to chase you Noah even though I know exactly where you are. If I ever meant anything to you call me.

It's been close to a month and I guess I'm just realizing that we might be over. Dr. Marshall hasn't heard from you and neither have your clients. You just left us behind, hope you're well.

I moved your things to storage even though I really just wanted to burn them. I left the key with Rob in apt 234. I'm only paying for the first month of storage.

There was nothing after that. For a moment I wanted to call Cassie but what would I say? When I got the call that Ma was dead I booked a flight and started packing. I didn't cross my mind to talk to Cassie even though we were getting married in a few hours.

The guilt I felt for getting married despite my own mother not being able to make it, gave way to grief and there wasn't much room for anything else.

Countless of missed calls from Cassie and my patients filled my call log. It was overwhelming but all of that felt so far away. It was odd but no part of me wanted my old life back. I put the phone back into my pocket.