Alicia: The girl who wasn't expecting this ✔️

😈 Chapter 19 😈

I never expected this; I never expected any of this! 

My friend leaving me, all this male attention.

An even shittier life than before.

Why is life so fucking annoying?!

I now sat in the mirror looking at my dull face.

A face full of regret, a face full of pain, a face drained from partying and drinking; I'm a fucking mess!

I looked at myself, wearing the same clothes but a different face.

I sighed in sadness.

Time to go to fucking school.

However this time going to school would be different, because this time I had no one.

No one to accompany me on the journey, no one to call me first thing in the morning, absolutely fucking nobody!

So, with that mind set; I made my way to school.

My hair covering the majority of my face as I held it to the ground, my arms crossed over my chest.

I walked the treacherous journey to school, it seemed so much longer then I've previously remembered.

I then made it to the school gates, which I instantly stopped at.

I was too scared to proceed. I was too scared to face those who had hurt me. I was too scared about being 'the bitch that cracked open'.

Taking a few deep breathes, I started to walk again.

But I instantly regretted it!

The whispers engulfed me, surrounded me.

No matter how hard I tried to conceal myself, I still felt so exposed!

I started to jog up the school steps, trying to escape the whispers; but that didn't happen, they only seemed to get louder with every passing step.

I ran down the corridors full of teens, passing the judgemental eyes and the tormenting cackles.

The whispers continued, causing me to run faster down the continuous corridors.

I ran into a random classroom and slammed the door shut.

I then laid my back against the door and slowly slid to the ground.

Uncontrollable tears flooded my vision,  my hands shaking.

This certainly was my personal fucking hell?!

It took me a good 10 minutes to regain my strength.

Once I knew I had a hold of my emotions; I went out into the hall way.

However once I walked out into the hallway, attention was brought back onto me.

I stared at all the eyes of the teens which have surrounded me for years. Every single person was staring.

So, I ran away from them.

Well, I tried.

As soon as I turned the corner I bumped into Josie.

"Move out my way, bitch!" She said.

I just glared at her, "fuck you." Was all I was able to say.

"Hah, says the whore of the school!" She said.

"I'm not the one who fucked 20 guys in one night." I said.

I then felt a sting on my cheek.

I looked at her hand and felt a tear slip.

Josie then put her face besides my ear, "Everyone knows you always lie, so don't make shit up about me!" She whispered into my ear.

And just like that she and her minions left, leaving me to stand and feel the judgmental eyes burning into my head.

My tears started to blur my vision, which I was about to run so no one could see them; but before I could the jocks came up to me.

They laughed in my face and Zak gave me a wink, "Maybe we can hook up another time." Zak said whilst grabbing my ass.

I just stood there and let another tear slip.

I looked over to Xavier and saw that his face was lowered, like he was ashamed to even make eye contact with me.

I just stood there as they made fun of me, my eyes glued to Xavier the whole time. I was just a fool for actually thinking he would stick up for me.

After they left I ran out of school.

I continuously ignored all the teachers shouting at me and ran back home.

I ran down all the streets, now letting all the tears go.

Every single fucked up thing!

Everyone fucking leaving me!

Every person thinking I'm lying when I'm fucking not!

Everyone thinking I would sleep with another girls guy!

Fucking shitty, shitty life?!

And amidst my frustration I kicked a random rubbish bin over, continuing to run home after that.

I rammed the door open and dashed up the stairs and into my 'mothers' room.

I ran over to the bed and lifted the mattress up.

Under the bed was a stashed gun which my step- douche Eric hid.

Once I found it, I grabbed it and ran back into my room.

I grabbed a cardboard box and put the stuff close to my heart in there.

I hid the gun under my bed and hid the box under my bed.

I need to get out of this hell hole, I need to get out now!