Butterfly Boy

Chapter 32

Today was not a good day. Today was a please-don't-talk-to-me day. Today was a I-wish-I-had-the-artistic-motivation-to-make-a-'keepout'-poster-and-paste-it-on-my-door day.

Danny took a deep breath and let it out. He banged the back of his head on the wall, coaxing the nostalgic emotions to knock out and leave place for the fluffy feeling he felt when he thought of his friends. It was no use.

He looked down and traced the lines of the wood of the desk he was sitting on. He was feeling restless. And when that happened he adopted strange positions in his room: Flipped on the chair. Legs up, upside down on the bed. High up on the closet. Or on his textbooks on the desk as he was now. His feet were on the chair that kept sliding away, adding on to his frustration.

He wasn't exactly sure what he was feeling at the moment, but it was familiar. It didn't happen that often, though. He was a very adaptable person and could roll with pretty much whatever was thrown his way. But he had his down times. Some worse than others.

It was these situations that he had to adapt to that put him in this position.

I'm pretty sure we can all agree that Danny doesn't have a normal life. It was exciting, sure, but he felt pretty alone because of that sometimes. Sometimes...he wanted to have someone who could relate to him or understand him.

It wasn't that he wanted someone to go through everything he'd gone through- no way. He didn't want that. But he kinda just wanted someone to know, which would be hard if they hadn't gone through what he had....ugh.

Danny rolled over, kicking some pencils and books on the ground as he went to lay on his side.

Sam and Tucker tried their best. They did. But it was hard for them.

He just wanted someone to tell him if he was doing everything well. Someone who knew of all the lazy nights he'd been, not hunting ghosts, but playing video games. All the times he didn't feel like doing homework anymore and his friends would think it was because of ghosts. They were too accepting. All the times he would use his powers for petty revenge. All the times he hadn't been a saving hero of justice.

Would someone who knew all that still say he was doing well? That he was doing his best? He could always do better. But he knew that wouldn't be healthy. But was he doing enough?

You're helping Paris, he reminded himself. He snorted. Yeah, like how he couldn't help Amity Park.

But you did, the hopeful voice remained, you helped Amity Park.

Not as much as I could have, though.

He almost snorted again. Frustrated with himself and his lack of self preservation. You are allowed to have some time to yourself.

At the expense of others??

You're not perfect.

Exactly.

...

He sighed. His mind going blank. Or running circles along the same arguments again. He wasn't sure. This was a battle he'd tried to end many times for many years.

And he also felt alone.

Unsure.

Angry that he felt that.

Abruptly, he slid from the desk and shuffled downstairs. He didn't bother to wave the butterflies that got in his view away. They were being kind. Attached to his body as they were. It felt slightly ticklish, but he didn't have the energy to laugh.

They perched on the walls he passed before taking off again and flying behind him.

He made his way to the kitchen and slowly and clumsily grabbed the box of sugar.

A sticky note on it said 'No, Danny'.

He ignored it and poured it in a bowl.

However, he felt a bit guilty and poured some milk on it too.

He sat on the couch and turned on the TV. He had homework, but he deserved a break.

He was reminded that he's had plenty of time to do the homework on the days before and had procastinated...again. He didn't have time for a break and that was his own fault. And he was wasting it now.

But he pushed those thoughts back. He didn't feel like aknowledging  them at the moment.

Mmh yeah
This is mostly my own experience and what I basically do when this happens. Except for the sugar part....ok maybe a bit of the sugar part.

I like to write these kinds of things in my books that I know others can relate to.

Esto tampoco tiene TANTO que ver con la historia supongo. Pero me pareció importante.
Ya viene el siguiente capítulo.