The Centre - a Home for Fox (bxb+/poly)

16. Scars

🦊 F O X 🦊

It's too damn cold now, endless nights of sitting outside, listening to music and stargazing was over.

We were all going a bit stir crazy after closing the pool for the foreseeable future. Our evenings consisted mainly of movies and game nights. All inside.

After a delicious roast beef supper that Wren had prepared, we were all sprawled out in the movie room. I was half lying on Bryce, in between his thighs, my back against his chest. He was lazily drawing shapes on my chest and I would whisper what shape I thought it was. Near the end of the movie, Bryce got up to get a drink and take a piss. I took the opportunity to sprawl out, kicking Bryce to the loveseat with Wren. Zane sat down in front of me on the floor so we could share a bowl of popcorn.

The first movie ended, so Milo put another one in. It was a drama and had sucked me in. Word for word, I couldn't look away. Laughing and crying right along with the characters. I was on an emotional roller coaster. During one scene they were talking about scars and all I could think about was Zane's damaged skin.

He said he was going to talk to us about it but it's been weeks now since our trip; still nothing.

Kicking the throw blanket off of me in a huff, I made up some phony excuse of needing to fold my laundry and went up to my room.

I inserted my ear buds, grabbed my stress ball and threw myself on the bed landing on my back. Lobbying the ball to the ceiling and back into my hand.

"There's nothing I can do."
Thud
"He doesn't want my help."
Thud
"Why won't he accept my help?"
Thud
"What can I do?"

Thud

Thud

Thud

I was lost in my thoughts. Squeezing the ball as if taking the life out of it. Eyes shut; thinking, scheming, swindling for ideas. None seemed right, he would kill me if I attempted half of them; the other half, he'd hate me for.

I didn't even notice when my bed dipped. But I was pulled out of the never ending tunnel of questions and crazy ideas when I felt something brush against me.

My eyes shot open and searched my surroundings.

Zane was there, lying next to me smiling.

"Whats got you so worked up?"

Lying back down, "Wouldn't you like to know!" I snorted.

I was livid, here he was, smiling. Like everything was OK.

I flicked my wrist and sent the ball back up to the ceiling again.

Thud

Thud

Thud

He reached out and grabbed it before it landed back in my hand.

"Zane...I'm not in the mood." I groaned.

"Who said I was in the mood?" He smirked.

Rolling my eyes, I reached out to grab the ball back from him, he swiftly fell back, with me landing on top of him. He held his hand up above his head, out of my reach. I was still squirming for it when his other hand cupped my face. His warm hand on my cheek, pads of his fingers caressing my cheekbone.

I stilled, my eyes slowly lowered to his, his eyes were flicking from my eyes to my lips. His tongue darted out to lick his bottom lip.

"What are you doing?" I murmured, breath catching in my throat. Heart skipping a beat.

He slowly leaned in, giving me the option to pull back. Our lips barely met, I could feel the steel ring in the center of his bottom lip.

"No..." I breathed out, pulling back inch by inch. "We can't, Zane." My words coming out in barely a whisper.

He stared in my eyes for a few seconds, "Yeah." he cleared his throat while shaking his head, "No, I know." He nudged me off the rest of the way so I was sitting on up on the bed.

"I want to, like really really want to, but...we're not in a relationship." I swallowed.

"Rules." Both of his hands glided up his face then pushing his jet black hair back."

"Yeah...rules." I looked down to the bed and started picking a string on the bed spread.

"I'll see you later." he started to walk towards the door, head down.

No...no no no.

"Wait Zane," I rushed over to him, "tell me." I looked in his eyes and held my breath. "Please."

His eyes were searching mine, "Fox..."

I gradually lifted my trembling hands to the bottom of his shirt. My eyes held his gaze. Hesitantly, I lifted the hem and gently placed my hands on his scarred stomach. He inhaled sharply.

Grooves, lumps, craters, dips and ridges, hard and soft all of what my hands felt as I maneuvered them up his abdomen to his chest. I lingered on some parts, where the skin dipped deep and then raised again.

His eyes fluttered shut when my fingered grazed his nipples. His lips parted. I could feel the small buds hardening under my light touch. He hasn't felt hands on this part of his body in a long time, if not ever. I fought the burning desire to rip his shirt of and show him how much I could worship his body. Instead, I brought my hands back down and out from under his shirt. He whimpered lightly when the contact was severed.

"Look at me." I insisted.

His eyes fluttered open and locked on mine.

"Tell us, please," my eyes pleading, "you can show us and tell us anything, you're our friend, if not more, Zane. There will be no judgement, I promise you. We've been through so much and come so far." My eyes hardened, "I refuse to not have more of you. I can't live in this house with you anymore and not have you, all of you!"

"Damn, Fox," his breath pushed past his lips, "I'm having a hell of a hard time saying no to you."

Yes... yes yes yes.

"What if...." he started.

"No, not what if. I'll sit with you the entire time. Hold your hand if you need me to." I waited a beat, "I won't leave your side, Zane."

He pulled me in and wrapped his arms around me. We stood there for a few minutes. I could smell the cleaning supplies he uses for his paint. He smelled of rubbing alcohol and woodsy fresh scented body wash. It was hypnotic.

"OK, Fox...let's go." He mumbled on top of my head into my wavy hair as we languidly pulled apart.

I took his opened hand in mine. "Let's go."