stay with me

Chapter 22

Grey:

Of course even on holidays my nightmares can't decide to take a night off. I wake the same way I did yesterday. The same way I always do. Today though instead of going for a run outside I decide to take advantage of the home gym we have in our house. I love running outside but I know that my parents will wake up earlier today than they did yesterday and I know they'll worry if I'm not in the house when they wake up.

I check my phone as I head downstairs and I see that there is still no response from Hunter. My heart hurts. I wish it didn't but it does. I get on the treadmill downstairs and I run and I run. It's not the same as running outside but it's still therapeutic. I run until I'm gasping for air and then I finally stop and decide to do some abs. I'm about to leave and go upstairs to take a shower when I see the punching bag in the corner. I had forgotten we had it. It had been so long since I came down here.

I wrap my hands and slip on a pair of boxing gloves and I begin punching. I let out all of my frustrations and all of my anger. Looking at me people might not see it but I was an angry girl. I hit the bag until my arms feel like they are going to fall off and I can't raise them anymore. Once I stop I fall to the ground and the tears begin to fall. This time though I'm not crying because I'm sad I'm crying because I'm angry. I'm so god damn angry. Why did he have to leave me? And why did he have to make me promise him all those things? I was mad at him. It's the first time I have ever admitted it to myself but I am now and I hate it. I hate that it's consuming me right now and the worst part is I know that if he was here he would let me yell at him. He would take it and when I was finally done he would hold me in his arms and let me cry and tell me he was sorry. I wish he had a flaw that would make it easier for me to move on. I wish I could look back and say you know maybe it really wasn't meant to be, maybe we weren't meant for each other, but I can't. He was perfect. He loved me more than life itself and I loved him the same way. I still loved him. I always would and I think that was a part of the reason I was angry.

Once the tears have stopped, I head back upstairs and take a shower. As the hot water rushes over me I feel the anger subside and slip back down into its hidden spot in my heart. I need to keep it there today. I need to seem happy for my family's sake. I need to stop being a burden to them.

I get dressed and do my hair and make-up since we are having relatives over. Luckily they are ones I like and they don't ask stupid questions like 'how are you holding up?' or 'so Grey any new guys in your life yet?'. I hated when people did that especially people who are related to me.

It's about 7:30 in the morning when I look at my phone again. I know I shouldn't because I'll most likely be disappointed but I can't help it. When I look I'm shocked when I see that I have a text from Hunter.

Hunter: Hey sorry about missing your text last night. I was working and since it was Thanksgiving Eve we were swamped and I didn't take a break all night. I'm glad you had a good day yesterday. You deserve it. Once again I'm so sorry. Text me later or call me. And Grey? Happy Thanksgiving.

As I read the text over and over it's like I can hear his voice and I smile. I feel silly now for assuming he was ignoring me. His explanation made perfect sense and I believe him. I have no reason not to. He's never lied to me before.

Me: No worries, you're already forgiven. And Hunter? Happy Thanksgiving. Have a great day.

After I text him I head downstairs since I can hear that my mother is awake and as I walk down the stairs I feel lighter than I did when I woke up this morning. It was amazing to me how Hunter could do that when no one else could. Fear creeps into my mind for a second because if he can make me feel like this than that means he can hurt me, but I decide to push those fears back. I don't want to think about that today.