Reborn as a Side Character in the Beastworld

Chapter Eleven

After Harvey left, Winston laid down next to me and we stayed in each other's arms in silence. I had so many thoughts and questions that I started making a mental note of all the things I wanted to ask Harvey and all the things I would need to prepare for the cub when it was born.

 What herbs help with morning sickness? What food should I avoid? Is it safe to bathe in cold water? What physical activities can I do? What should I avoid? Can I still have sex? 

Some of these questions I knew the answer to, if I were still human. Since my village and family had thought I was barren, I was not privy to the conversations pregnant females had together. I felt like there was so much I still didn't know.

"You never told me." Winston's deep voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Hmm?" I tried to look up and see his face but his chin was on the top of my head.

"About your family. Your village."

I couldn't tell what he was feeling from his tone. He was right though. I hadn't told him. Why? There were a variety of reasons but the main one being, if people had known I came from a sick village, I would never have made it to the City of Beasts. I may have even been culled by Winston's troupe for fear that I would spread illness to them.

Did he feel angry at my silence? Betrayed for omitting such important information? But this was Winston.

"You know why." I said. And he did too. Winston was well traveled. He knew the dangers I would have faced if anyone had known.

"I do but... after we mated. Why didn't you tell me then? Do you not trust me?" Again, his tone was too mechanical to know what he was thinking.

Damn. I cursed myself internally. I had done it again. Made him feel like he wasn't good enough. Just because his mark was on my back, didn't mean he couldn't doubt my feelings for him. He was right. I should have told him after we'd mated. It was true I'd had a lot of other things on my mind at the time, but a part of me knows that I was just being selfish and scared.

"You're right." His body stiffened. "I should have told you. I was... scared. I'm sorry." I said honestly.

He pushed my shoulders back just enough so he could look at me. His expression was one of surprise.

"You don't need to apologize. That wasn't... I'm not blaming you." He pulled me close again. "How do I say this? I just want you to know you can trust me, Bailey. I don't want you to feel like you need to hide anything from me. Especially now that we're going to have a cub. You can rely on me. I'm your mate. I will always be on your side."

He'd said it again. 'We' are having a cub. My heart swelled with love for him.

It was my turn to pull back so I could see him. "I do trust you. Completely. I can't promise to tell you everything all of the time, but it isn't because I don't trust you. Some things are just too complicated for me to talk about right now. In time I promise to tell you everything."

He nodded in acceptance.

I had basically just admitted to keeping secrets, but he looked satisfied with that. He could hear the truth of my words. I may keep secrets, but I would never lie. Not to him. Someday I would have to find a way to tell him about my memories of my past life, but for now, this was enough. I kissed him and we resumed basking in each other's warmth.

"Do you want me to send someone?" His baritone voice vibrating where my forehead touched his skin.

"Hmm?" I asked again not quite catching his meaning.

"To your village. I could send some males with a healer to check on the situation."

"You would do that? But what if they got sick?"