cry with me💔
trigger warning: losing a loved one, drug addiction, abandoning parent, grief
good notes: cuddles and comfortingʃ♡ƪ
693 words
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The news broke from your last sincere remaining family, your brother, informing you of the passing of your foster mother.
Growing up you've never fancied common childhood feels as when your arrival fell you into that age, you stood outside the gates from the two people who outcast your being. Your biological mother internalizing all symptoms roading to life of drug addiction and frequent heroin shots you thought were sprouting freckles, overdosing the morning of your fifth birthday, the oblivious mind of yours unearthing her body lessening of oxygen, your father having been four years dispatched from the frame, you celebrated without her likes, only feigning the upset back and forths of your mother's side of few aunts and the sirens of police vehicles adding to your harrowing day.
The rest went a route of historical burdens you brawl to forget. It apprehends your heart in strikes when your fingers gripped the memorial card of aging creases on her furrowing, hearty smile. The last picture, in your opinion, sums up her motherly residence she blessed you into.
She walked in on seeing a single tear from the blocked river in your once kindle eyes.
Running to your side a sob pulsed her skin the dam breaking as you thought back on your mama's comforts when she wiped your casted tears, dull yellowed by a street lamp, result of your first of many heartbreaks, being left out in the nip only safety being a loving hold.
"What is it sweet girl.. you're okay baby, you're okay" Taylor performed an almost identical still slow dance to comfort you, grazing through your hair pasture, repetitive in her petting yet you understandably missed the old smell of baking pies or the remanence of whatever roast your mom cooked up for you and your brother. The blackout of any speaking set you both like stones for a while.
Throwing a hook at the deep, your girlfriend starts up. "Honey.." a glint of falling rocks wedging the ignite your eyes needed but couldn't bear the brightening of. You held your face away from her, blank at your room wall, color filled but dawning a nineties black, your voice brim with its static. You remained quiet.
"Alright sweet girl, whenever your ready sweetheart, I'm here lover, I'm here" she aid. She felt the wrinkle of her nightgown and a slight pinch of skin, noting you marked her assurance but still couldn't architect words. An internal hiccup took a leap inside her, sticking her lungs as she glazed the pamphlets gravings, clung with more force comprehending the moment, sorrow too dawned upon her as you both sat at the edge of the once ricketing bed to your burying sobs.
Her cheeks tissued the edges of her own starting tears, but fighting her togetherness for you. Just kissing your hair, invading your feels through her condolences and tender words pushed thin between your cries and strangling blabs clenched by your teeth. The night faded and fell as you found the moon outside your curtains shone bigger and brighter, still lingering under solacing ease, covered by dainty arms, the darkness of your bedroom, no one could replace the woman that plant flowers into the struggling springtime of your life, but as the funeral took a date in the following day, for now, the leaf that fell when her flower took its last breath, a petal she gave her true blessings and warm grants to, Taylor, is the burning match that'll journey you through this loss.
"I know your silence sweety, you're still processing this difficulty, and this side, yours, I will never leave. You can cry on my sleeve, break what objects already lost of value to us, but you will make it y/n, you are stronger than any rock in a quarry, a fighter against all odds, and my girl, you will make it."
All events after the news, you remained gagged of speech only communicating with tighter holds or rigid nods she took notice. You held whatever physicality to the surety there was no absence of light you'll walk alone.
