My MC partner | Jungwon |

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟑𝟗: 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮

"Hello everyone! I'm the MC Joowon! I'm afraid that Jungwon won't be here for a while since he is on tour, so I invited a very special guest! The legendary 36th MC, TXT's leader Choi Soobin sunbaenim!" I say enthusiastically as I step aside so that my new MC partner can be completely focused by the camera.

Then, we danced a little to the title song of TXT's new comeback. Since they will have promotions throughout the month, it was decided that he would be the special MC while Jungwon is overseas. Besides, he was and still is a very beloved MC to the viewers of the show so I bet the viewers will love seeing him again every Friday.

I remember when we were rehearsing the script for the first time together, I couldn't help but feel nervous since he is someone who I admire a lot. Furthermore, he is also my sunbaenim in the MC field so I really wanted to do a good job.

"Hello everyone! I'm back as special MC... Akong! I'm the MC Soobin!"

"Wow sunbaenim it is certainly so nice to see you!" I add as he turns to face me. "You haven't been here in a very long time, right?"

"That's right. I'm actually really nervous, by the way. You'll have to take the lead Joowon-ssi!" He states but we both know that I am the one who is more nervous between us.

"I'll do my best!" I declare confidently regardless of how I was truly feeling.

"Time for the first MC task! Let's check today's line up." Soobin sunbaenim announces whilst reading his script cards.

The program continued as usual. We did the interview cams and filmed dance challenges with idols of other groups. I did everything I was supposed to do with a big smile on my face because I love being MC, but why does none of that helped me to feel better?

I thought that once I was back in Music Bank my mood was going to change because then my attention would be on something that would require my complete focus, but how silly of me to think that since that is the place where everything started. The place that brought us together.

It's like everything I see brings me back to him. The script cards, the microphone and even the matching outfits. Everywhere I go reminds me of him. The waiting room and the stairs in the building. The place where we were just playing and laughing but unfortunately that resulted in the downfall of what we had.

I wonder how he is doing right now. I wish I could just text him, but I don't think he will respond... There are times when I cling to the possibility that maybe he's missing me too, but I bet the last person on his mind is me, considering how busy and tired he might be. I shouldn't worry anymore. He's doing his job, so I'll keep doing mine.

⋅ ── ⋆⋅୨୧⋅⋆ ── ⋅

Every night just before sleeping, I find myself holding the keychain he got for me as I remember all the times we had fun together whether it was while being MCs or just in each other's company. That's when I like to think of the keychain as a kind of magic lamp, meaning that if I hold on to it long enough he might suddenly appear next to me, but of course that never happens.

I thought that as the days went by, the emptiness I feel in my heart would eventually fade away, but now the month is almost over and that feeling still lingers so presently in me. There are moments when I feel so vulnerable that just holding his hand, even if it's just for a second would be enough to make everything fine again.

Sometimes I get this urge to hear his voice, so I reach for my phone and replay all the voice notes he sent me over the past months since we exchanged phone numbers. "Joowon-ah where are you? I'm already waiting for you to read the script. Get here soon, please, I want to see you!" I think I never fully realize how much I like the way he says my name. I like it a lot.