ME AND YOU? || johnnie guilbert x female reader

chapther 17 - three days

Y/Ns pov:

It was the next day, I woke up with a heavy heart. This shit is so painful, I can't believe Johnnie lied to my face and thought I'd never find out?

I stood up from my bed, my body feeling heavy. I picked up my phone while walking out to the tiny kitchen and checked my messages.

9+ new messages from Johnnie
2 new messages from Taraa<3
I opened Tara's messages first.

Taraa<3, 7h ago: Girlll I'm still at Jake's and Johnnie's and I literally hear Johnnie cry in his room, should I cry with him or laugh? LMAO
Taraa<3, 2h ago: Have you talked to Johnnie anything tho?

I wasn't feeling it to answer her. She's probably just saying she's hearing Johnnie cry so I feel bad and forgive him. I don't know what to do, I do love Johnnie and I can't just block him and move on? That's impossible. Here I am, standing alone in my kitchen at 11am having no idea what to fucking do with my life.
I decided to make some breakfast but in the process of making my breakfast my doorbell rang. It's probably just Tara so I yell "COME IN!" really loud, loud enough for my voice to be heard all the way out to the hallway.
The door opens and I look over to my door to see who it is. That's not Tara. It's Johnnie. He stands quiet in my kitchen with messy hair, no makeup and pajamas. Did he just wake up and have someone drive him to my house? I stand there quietly and look at him, waiting for him to talk.
"Y/n.." He says, looking like he's going to cry. Why is he so sad? It's not like I cheated on him, did I?
"Get to talking or leave" I say, sassy. I shouldn't even be mad, I should be sad. I am sad though. I don't know why I act so angry.
"I'm sorry y/n please, I can't lose you. You are all I have and I know I fucked upp so bad but I really can't do it without you" He tells me, I've never heard him talk so quick. It's like he's been training for this exact moment. Like he wrote a script for it.
I stay quiet. I have no words to say. I want to say something but my mouth won't open like I want it to.
"Please y/n, I'm sorry I lied to you, I was nervous and really didn't want you to worry about the whole Alex situation" Johnnie continued as tears started streaming down his bare face. Maybe he really is sorry?
"I do forgive you, Johnnie. I think I just need some time to.. process this" I finally say. Johnnie's face lights up as I speak.
"I'm sorry y/n. I'll talk to you later, Jake's in the car waiting for me" He blurts out, waiting for me to say something reassuring but I don't. Johnnie leaves my apartment and now I'm even more confused about what's going on.
I decide to call Tara and retell her the entire story.

Tara picks up the phone the second I hit the call button.
I explain everything from when I woke up to when Johnnie left. Tara stays quiet and listens carefully, not missing a single detail I tell.

JOHNNIEs POV:

After I left y/n's apartment Jake drove us home again. I'm so stressed out and I just need y/n to forgive me.
Jake broke my thoughts as we got into the house.
"Dude, how'd it go?" Jake asked me. It's weird he didn't ask me in the car. I stay quiet for a while before even trying to answer his question.
"Good, I guess. She said she'd forgive me but needed time. No idea what that means" I explain. "I'm going to stream a bit now" I tell Jake and leave the living room.
I walk my way into my room and start my computer to prepare Twitch so I can stream.

"Hey guys!!" I say as I start the live and followers start to join. I stay silent and read the chat until I see a username that I recognize in the chat. That's y/n. She really joined my stream and typed in "hello" in the chat? Why would she do that? I mean I'm not complaining but she just said she needed time, didn't she?
The chat seemed to also see y/n's comment and started asking me where she is.

Chat:
User1: Where's y/n?
User2: Omg y/n is watching the stream!!!
User3: Why isn't y/n streaming with you?
"Y/n isn't here right now, a lot of things have happened and I'm not speaking about it. Y/n if you're watching: I love you. Now let's move on and talk about something else" I say, sounding way more upset than I am. I pick up my guitar from the floor to get the chat asking me to play different songs instead of going crazy and assuming me and y/n broke up and shit. It's pathetic.
I started playing "My love, mine all mine" By Mitski, as someone requested. Deep in I know I'm singing in hope that y/n sees it.