Twenty-One

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By the next day I felt cold as stone. Megan had managed to cut me wide open, but I was a pro at stitching myself back together. Or that's what I'd like to believe. The ache in my chest was back, amplified by the recent painful events, but I was good at hiding it. The years of practice while living with my parents really paid off in that sense.

Blair and I were currently making our way down the hall towards Megan's class and I wanted to puke. Even though she had defended me and tried explaining herself yesterday I couldn't seem to shake the image of her with Nikki. It burned and made the ache spread all over my body. Every time I looked at her that's what I saw. I hated it.

She stood at her door and I could feel the tension thicken. Blair probably felt it to because the mood between us seemed to change.

"What's going on between you and Megan?" she asked.

"She slept with Nikki." I flinched at the words.

Blair nearly fell to the ground. "What?" Why didn't you tell me?!"

Because it hurt like a bitch to think about, I thought.

I just shook my head, which Blair gratefully understood. She could tell I didn't want to talk about it, so she remained silent. I would eventually explain, just not now.

She sighed. "We'll talk about it later, okay?"

I nodded her off.

Megan spotted me but I refused to hold her gaze. I wasn't sure if the burning in my heart would ever go away, but it was unfortunately getting easier to deal with.

I walked past her without a word and spent the class in silence. She didn't bother me which was a little too predictable, but I was grateful. Maybe she had gotten the hint that I needed distance to repair. Maybe this was what was supposed to happen.

Eventually I fell asleep, Megan unable to even keep my attention anymore. But when I woke up I was alone in the classroom. She was closing the door while I still remained in my desk. Great.

She looked at me but I didn't say a thing. I needed to get out of here.

"Can we talk about the other day?"

I shrugged. Why couldn't I make myself leave?

"Are you giving me the silent treatment?"

I answered her with silence.

She took a deep breath. Was she trying not to give up on me? I wouldn't be surprised if she did. It wasn't often people fought to be in my life, and I was so good at icing people out when they hurt me. It took a special kind of person to break through my walls.

She sat in the desk in front of me. Her soft eyes reminded me so much of a clear summer day. I found that no matter how hard I tried to keep her out there was just something about her that broke me down.

But that didn't mean I would let her see that.

"I know neither of us want to talk about it, but we need to," she stated. "And I know I hurt you but Sam you can't just shut me out."

Her pleading almost worked. She was really good at sounding vulnerable, but I knew better. Plenty of people had played me into being sympathetic and had turned right back around and taken advantage of me before. No way would I let Megan do that.

"You remember how I told you I needed closure?" she asked.

I just stared.

"That night when she came over we talked about a lot. And yes, we slept together. But I think I finally got what I needed."

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