Chapter 5

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S

imone

{next day}

Waking up to the sound of the door closing looking outside and saw Jonah in the yard. Putting on some workout clothes then headed to the kitchen grabbing two bottles of water. Opening the door the air hit me hard in a refreshing manner. Jonah looked at me with guilt and sympathy in his eyes.

“Good morning.” “Momma I’m so sorry for yelling cussing and getting angry with you. I wasn’t mad at you. I was mad at him and you were in the line of fire and took it out on you. God mom I am so sorry.” I nodded my head in understanding. “Go for a walk with me.” He stood up I held out a bottle of water for him which he took.

“When I first meet Gavin.. Well, truthfully I never really meet him. It was my first year of high school my best friend and only Maddison she begged me to go to a back to school party. Maddison and Gavin were in higher grades actually everybody at that party was. When I saw him dancing, laughing and talking with other I was in awe of how he was. You could not live in this town without hearing about Gavin Langsford. When he tried to talk to me during school I left. He wanted me to go to the football game. Maddison kept pushing me ‘til I finally said I would. The party after the win was boring actually I just wanted to leave. He saw me and took me home.”

I looked at Jonah who was listening intensely.

“Gavin asked me out I turned him down his ass showed up at the house. Mom and William fell in love with Gavin while I wanted to distance myself from him. The night I slept with him for the first time I was all over the place mixed with a bundle of nervous but I did it then a few weeks later I was dumb and did it again. Gavin is the only man I ever slept with. I would love to say Maddison should have kept pushing because know if she didn’t I would not have did anything. At the same time, I wouldn’t have you, Jonah.”

Taking a swallow of water then continued

“I knew what type of person Gavin was and I put myself in that situation, of course, I could have and should have said no but I didn’t. Maddison would say you are so lucky he wants you but it wasn’t true. When I found out I was pregnant I  told him. He said get rid of it now. When Maddison and I were at the mall in the food court eating before my bus was leaving I saw Gavin for the last time. He was with another female. He looked at me and mouthed killed it. His eyes were a cold blue sending chills all over me.”

“Mama” “Yes” “did you love him” “I did. I shouldn’t have and I should have kept my distance more, but I did fall in love with Gavin Langsford.” “When grandma’s husband kicked you out in a short time you lost two men who you cared about and loved when you could have gotten rid of me.”
I stopped walked looking Jonah in his eyes.

“Please don’t ever say that. I did lose them and for a little bit it hurt me a lot but every day you would grow inside of me kicking, moving, growing you made me so happy even before you came. So even though I lost those two I got one who was better than both of them and who love more than both of them. Jonah, you are my son, my heartbeat and there is not a day I regret having you. You make my life brighter and worth living and neither one of them could do that only you.”
Jonah hugged me tightly. “I love you momma” “I love you” We pulled apart from our embrace.  

“Are we still going to see grandma  today?” “Yeah, we need to go get cleaned up so we can go.” “Will he be there?” “I doubt it but I will make sure before we get there.
 
 
“Odell said William was at work and would not be the hospital for a while.” Waking up to the desk asking the receptionist for Patricia Blackstone room. “Her room is 754” “Thank you,” I said with a warm smile. After the elevator ride, Jonah and I walked down the corridor ‘til we reached her room. Knocking on the door quietly a young white lady open the door.

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