"You're Alone Kokichi, And You Always Will Be" // A Saiouma Angst Story

Chapter 16 - Ice Cream

Kokichi's POV

I slowly opened it, and I saw... "Kaito?"

"Hey, so uh... I know I've done and said some pretty rude things to you but.. I just wanna apologize. I'm sorry. And, I saw what happened with you and Saihara, I can try to talk to him about it if you want me to."

I stood there in disbelief, not being able to comprehend what was going on. Was this a trick? Was he trying to become my friend and then betray me? Whatever he was trying to do, I just couldn't bring myself to trust him.

But I forced myself to, because just for a second, a split second, I felt the slightest feeling of belief and trust.

"S-sure... I guess..." I was going to shut the door, but Kaito stopped it from closing by putting his foot in the doorway. I looked up from the ground to look at him with confusion.

I could hear his voice trembling all of a sudden as he spoke. "Oh uhm.. uhhhh.. d-do you wanna hang out?" I could see worry and desperation on his face. I was a little wary about this, my feeling of distrust growing.

I hesitantly nodded. Kaito grabbed my arm to pull me out of my dorm and let go after he succeeded. "So, sidekick, where do ya wanna go? We can go anywhere, I have a car you know."

I was taken aback by Kaito calling me sidekick. It made suspicion rise inside of me. Why was Kaito being so nice? It was almost like he knew I was about to attempt again...

Kaito's POV

As I watched Kokichi run out of the building with tears rolling down his cheeks, I couldn't help but acknowledge the gut feeling I was having.

My stomach started to ache, this usually happens when I get a really bad gut feeling, so I decided to follow him.

I followed him all the way to his dorm, having to run at times to catch up to him so I didn't lose sight of him. When I saw him run into the apartment, I made the choice to knock on his door just to make sure he was ok.

I waited for a few minutes before knocking due to anxiety. What if he yelled at me like he did with Saihara? Whatever, just knock already. If anything he could be cutting again like Shuichi said he did. Don't you wanna help him?

I agreed with my thoughts and raised my arm up to the door. I waited for another minute before finally knocking. Kokichi didn't answer for a few seconds, I began growing worried, but before I could knock again, he answered.

"Hey, so uh... I know I've done and said some pretty rude things to you but.. I just wanna apologize. I'm sorry. And, I saw what happened with you and Saihara, I can try to talk to him about it if you want me to." I said, hoping he would accept my apology.

I could see Kokichi struggling to speak, but he eventually did. To my surprise, he accepted my offer and apology! "S-sure... I guess..."

As he said that, I took a little peak inside his dorm to see what he was doing before I knocked. I saw his bathroom door open and thought nothing of it.. until I looked closer.

There were razors, knives, ropes, and even a note in a box. There was even a bloody razor on the ground which I assumed he had been using before I knocked.

At this point, I was scared he would do something if I let him go back inside his dorm. I panicked and asked him if he wanted to hang out, trying to distract himself from doing anything dangerous or suicidal.

"Oh uhm.. uhhhh.. d-do you wanna hang out?" I heard myself stutter but ignored it. I was scared he wouldn't agree but he did. Relief washed over me. I felt like I was already warming up to him and becoming his friend.

"So, sidekick, where do ya wanna go? We can go anywhere, I have a car you know." I said. Kokichi shrugged and replied with, "I don't care, anything is fine with me." He said with a sigh.

Based off of his sigh, I assumed my prediction was right. so he was going to kill himself.. I interrupted him and saved him..

"Oh I know! How about we get icecream?" I asked cheerfully. Kokichi just emotionlessly nodded. I felt bad for him, I really did.

Knowing Maki and possibly even other people wanted him to die. I just couldn't imagine being in his place... it must be so overwhelming for him.

"Alright, here get in the passenger seat." He did as instructed and I got in after him. I began driving to the nearest ice cream place. "So, why did you run out of school early?" I asked, genuinely curious.

Kokichi jumped at that question. "Wait is that why you knocked on my door?" He asked, I could hear the anxiety in his voice rising as he spoke.

I quickly came up with an excuse. "Oh, no, I just heard noises coming from your room." I saw Kokichi's frightened posture slowly drop, probably with relief.

"Oh, we're here." I said as I pulled into the parking lot of the ice cream shop. I saw Kokichi wince at the sight of it. We stepped out of the car, my wallet in my hand.

Kokichi sat on a nearby bench while I ordered our ice cream cones. When I came back to him with them, I saw him slightly gag at the sight of the food, in which I questioned it in my mind.

"Here ya go, Sidekick!" I exclaimed, handing him the frozen desert. He took it, but he wasn't eating it.. he just.... stared at it with dead eyes.

"Hey, aren't ya gonna eat?" I questioned without thinking. Kokichi responded with, "I already ate a lot earlier haha.." But I could tell that was a lie from the way he said it.

"Oh come on, a little ice cream won't hurt. At least take a small bite." I said, pushing the cone towards his face. He moved his head back, avoiding it as if it was a poisonous wasp.

I pushed it even more closer to him, not wanting the poor boy to starve. He said no a few times, but I was worried for him and wanted him to eat, since he was really skinny.

He finally got tired of resisting and took a small bite. He tried to swallow it.. but instead he immediately gagged and vomited on the ground, coughing.

I looked at him, confused. But then it hit me.. never eating, really skinny, dangerously underweight, vomiting after trying to eat.... it all came to me at once after I took the time to connect the dots...

Did Kokichi have an eating disorder?

I turned to look over at him. I could see overwhelming fear in his eyes, tears welling up and about to start rolling down his cheeks. I asked a question. An important question.

"Hey Kokichi.. when was the last time you ate?"

1235 words! I'm actually surprised that I wrote this whole chapter in a day lol, ill make sure to get the next chapter out as soon as possible!