Time To Fuck Up The Timeline

B

Song Title: Secret By The Pierces

   "Why won't you let me pay for the wedding?" Naruto was arguing with Iruka and Anko.

   "Because we're grown ass adults who can pay for our own damn wedding." Anko pointed out.

   "And I'm a grown ass adult that's been living under your roof without charge for three years. I think I owe you guys at least one wedding." Naruto claimed.

   "And where is the money you'd be paying with? You're a child genin. You don't have a lot of money." Iruka said.

   "Ugh. Don't remind me. Being stuck in a child's body is awful." Naruto cringed. "But I do have money. A lot of it."

   "How?" Iruka asked.

   "I'm the son of the Fourth Hokage and a very talented kunoichi. They were rich and knew how to handle their money. As their only living relative, the money is mine. And I know where they kept their money so I can access it at any time." Naruto explained.

"Let's compromise then. We pay for half and you pay for the other half." Anko suggested.

   "Deal." Naruto agreed. "Now that we've got that out of the way, I know someone who loves to plan weddings."

"I've been called." Gaara burst in through the door.

"We really should start locking the doors." Anko said.

"Hello Gaara." Iruka greeted.

"Hello Iruka and Anko. Naruto told me you two are the ones who are getting married. Is this true?" Gaara asked.

"Don't make it sound like I'm untrustworthy." Naruto pouted.

"Sasuke and Sakura fiasco." Gaara brought up.

"That was a misunderstanding, ya know (sorry I keep forgetting about Naruto's tick)." Naruto whined.

"Either way, I've learned to double check your work." Gaara said.

"In this case, Naruto is correct." Iruka saved Naruto much to Anko's displeasure. She was rather enjoying the entertainment they were providing.

"Shocking." Gaara muttered.

"Rude." Naruto crossed his arms and looked away like a five year old.

"If you don't mind me asking, what made you decide to plan weddings? I never pegged you as the type to want to do these type of things." Anko asked.

"Oh, um it was actually my brother Kankuro who came up with the idea. I had a horrible reputation in my village. People were terrified by me. Not that I didn't deserve it, you know, with all the murders I've committed." Gaara said that a little too casually. "During the Chunin exams Naruto and I got into a little fight and changed my ways. I knew it would take time to gain the trust of my village, but after two years of the majority still being frightened of me even after helping around the village, which actually set me back a few steps considering one of the patients at the hospital had a heart attack and nearly died just by seeing me. Anyway, I went to my siblings for help and Kankuro suggested planning weddings since weddings are supposed to be peaceful and fun and joyous. Temari had a friend who's mom was getting remarried. They had forgiven me already and allowed me to plan the wedding. As it turns out I was really good at it and love it. Word got out and the more weddings I planned the more people saw me for the new me. The real me."

"After that how can we refuse the offer? How much do you charge?" Anko asked.

"I work for free. I don't really need the money considering I force my father to pay for everything I want. Just because I forgave him doesn't mean I'm above guilt tripping him into buying me things. That's actually how I got him to allow Temari and me to travel here. 'Hello, Father. Remember that time when you forced my uncle whom I really loved to blow himself up after claiming to have never loved me and how he blamed me for Mother's death all so that he'd get under my skin and hopefully kill me? Anyway, will you allow me to go to the leaf village with Temari?' Works like a charm."

"It's nice to hear your father's trying to make up for his shitty parenting." Naruto said.

"I'm just glad he's not doing any more murder attempts." Gaara said.

Anko and Iruka were one awful childhood story away from adopting the poor boy. Sure he was a grown man, but they wouldn't let that stop them.

"I've got to go now. I'm spending the day with Hinata. It is our wedding anniversary and we've got the entire day planned out." Naruto dismissed himself.

———

Walking in on Ino and Sai in a full on make out session was not something Naruto missed. They transformed themselves to be older so it wasn't weird for them. After a few times everyone agreed that kissing their loved ones on the mouth while they looked like children was way too weird. So anytime they were going to kiss and stuff (no not sex because they are physically 14 and do not want to accidentally get pregnant).

"Hello, Sai. I'm glad you remember the future." Naruto greeted.

"Ah, hello, Naruto. I see you're buying flowers for Hinata." Sai noticed. He and Ino released the transformation and ended the make out session.

"Yes, it's our wedding anniversary. Um, does Danzo know you're here?" Naruto asked.

"I doubt it considering he's dead." Sai smiled. Maybe that wasn't something you'd usually say with a smile, but who cares? Danzo being dead is a wonderful reason to smile so Sai's smile probably wasn't fake.

"He's what?! How?!" Naruto asked.

"Sasuke killed him." Sai answered.

"What do you think Tsunade will do when she finds out he's dead?" Ino asked.

"Throw a party. And if she finds out Sasuke did it, probably reward him. She hates Danzo." Naruto said.

"That's fair." Ino said.

Naruto meandered through the shop before settling on some yellow roses. Roses meant love, right?

"Yellow roses, huh? Wonderful choice IF YOU'RE TRYING TO FRIEND ZONE HER! Put it back and try again." Ino fumed.

"What? But you give roses to someone you love." Naruto had a bewildered expression on his face.

"Red roses mean love. Yellow roses mean joy and friendship. They're something I'd give to Sakura." Ino explained.

"Then what else means love? Red roses are kinda cliche." Naruto said.

"I'm glad you're actually thinking this through even if you are absolutely clueless about flowers. Normally I wouldn't care what customers buy, but someone like Hinata would know the meanings behind flowers. I'm sure she had to learn it with her being the daughter of the clan head. So think carefully about this.

"Red tulips mean perfect love. Carnations that are a darker shade of red means deep feeling of love and affection. Violets mean faithfulness. Magenta lilacs means love and passion." Ino stopped talking once she realized this was starting to become too much for Naruto.

"Ok. I think I got it. Since it's our anniversary would a bouquet of red tulips and violets be apropriate?" Naruto asked.

"That'll be perfect." Ino smiled. She put together the bouquet and sent Naruto away.

———

"Hold it. You can't just enter the compound. You're not a Hyuga. Turn around." A Hyuga ordered.

"Wait, but I've got flowers for Hinata. We're supposed to go on a date." Naruto said.

"I admit, you've cleaned up a bit, but I'm sure Lady Hinata has standards."

"She does but they're not high. And Naruto passes them I guess. Though I don't understand why." Neji came to Naruto's rescue. Sorta.

"Wow, that's rude." Naruto commented.

"Just go." Neji ordered and Naruto followed.

"Really, Neji? You think he's good enough for her?" The Hyuga asked.

"I don't think anyone's good enough for her, but Naruto's a good guy. I can trust him with her and he makes her happy."

"What are you, her father?"

"Shut up." Neji blushed.

——-

Well that's it for this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it!