Your POV
3 weeks passed and we picked mom and dad up from the airport in afternoon. Welp, back to normal life. Which I hate it.
February and It's almost Valentine's Day. I hate that day. Usually nobody wants me to be their valentine since I'm not much of an interesting guy. Welp, I get it. Of course no one wants to date me. I'm unattractive as fuck. Especially if they knew that I was a killer, which they don't. That's good.
I sighed and threw myself to my bed. Eric texted me.
Kickass: Sup bitch
You: I feel like shit it's almost Valentine's Day :(
Kickass: Damn
Kickass: Well uhh I have an idea to make it better 😈
You: better be good
Kickass: Well duh it will
Kickass: there's a after school dance in Valentine's Day at the gym and I'm making a plan to ruin it by making it rain with blood in the middle of the dance
You: That sounds but how are we gonna do that
Kickass: Well uhh we'll have to be in the back of the school where the hose thing is at and we'll replace the water with blood and after that we'll turn the fire emergency thing on and it will rain blood in the gym
You: Ok sounds good but how are we gonna get the blood
Kickass: KILLING FARM ANIMALS DUMBASS
You: Ok my bad
Kickass: Yes
Kickass: Ehh just do the gay bar thing in late February the Valentine's dance is more important right now
You: Okkkk 💕
Kickass: I gtg bye
You: Bye
That actually made my mood better. Thank you Eric.
Narrator POV
The next day is when you and Cartman started to go to the farm with guns and shoot most animals to get their blood. (Mainly Chickens, cows, pigs, and goats) To hide their bodies, you bury them while Cartman collects them to cook and eat.
(No shit I'm imagining a South Park scene where you and Cartman shoot the farm without any sounds and Psycho Killer by talking heads is the background music)
*SpongeBob narrator voice*
A few moments later...
Finally, both you of have enough blood. Cartman decided to keep the bag with bottles of blood until Valentine's Day.
When the farmer drove back to his farm, it scared him because most of his animals were gone. It stressed him out because he didn't know where they are and how they escaped. He couldn't take it, so he pulled out a gun and pointed it at himself.
Today was so much of a very busy day.
YOU ARE READING
Toxic (Cartman x male reader)
FanfictionThis is my first South Park fanfic so cringe all you want and no I'm not a new South Park fan. I started liking it like, 2019. M'kay And yes the title is from the song Toxic by Britney spears cuz it kinda fits ur relationship with Cartman in this fa...
