It's you

I cant stop crying

The next few days were going by quickly. Today is the last day of school before winter break and I'm thrilled.Classes were going by quickly and I barely noticed the side eye Brandon was giving me. Him and Lindsey seem to be doing well not that I care. Senior year is flying by and I could feel Harvard calling my name. After school Heather Aaliyah and I got our nails and toes done. Next week is my mother's annual Christmas party and I was ready. When I got home we had at least 57 people cleaning the house. I went in my room and decided to take a nap. That nap ended up being a full night of sleep. The next morning when I woke up I felt really lazy so I took a bath for at least 3 hours then when I got out I just went on my phone. I didn't want to do anything crazy. I just wanted to relax for the next few days so when it was time for the party I could get blackout drunk. For the next week I did exactly that. I relaxed and got a head start on some of my school work.When I was finished with some of my work I realized it was midnight and everyone was asleep. I tend to get really involved in my work and lose track of time. But I didn't feel tired at all so I decided to go for a walk. After standing on my porch I decided to walk to the lake and when I did I saw something that really pissed me off. Brandon and Lindsey laying on a blanket kissing and laughing by the water. I turned around as quick as I could and began running home. Midway home I realized I was crying. Why was I crying? It's just a stupid spot. My god why can't I stop freaking crying. I went to my room and looked out my window. What the hell is wrong with me I thought to myself.