It is said that second-born sons have all the fun. This much is certainly true for Benedict Bridgerton, free from the burdens held by his eldest brother, the Viscount. One must wonder, how does the second eldest Bridgerton spend his time?
To the to...
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"Come on, love. Let's go inside." Benedict whispered, stroking her hair gently as tears continued to roll down his cheeks. "I do not want you to get sick."
Madeleine sniffled and shook her head, clinging on to Benedict as he held her.
"No.. I just want to be here with you right now. No family, no loss, just us." Her voice was a whisper cloaked with such sadness that he had no choice but to comply, his heart aching for her. He rested his chin on top of hers, closing his eyes.
"Benedict?" She whispered softly, nuzzling her head into his chest. He hummed in response, lifting his head to look at her. She reached up and placed a gentle hand on his cheek, eyes full of tears.
"I am so sorry." Her voice broke as she said it, the tears falling from her eyes. He narrowed his eyebrows in confusion and placed his hand over hers.
"Sorry for what?" He whispered back, stroking his thumb soothingly over her hand. She broke her gaze from his, looking down.
"I.. I am sorry I could not keep our baby alive." She whispered weakly, her voice plagued with shame. She could not help but blame herself, feeling as though if she did things differently, their baby might still be alive. Benedict's lips parted in shock and he lifted her chin gently to look at him.
"Oh, Madeleine, this is not your fault. Don't you dare believe that this is in any way your fault." He stared into her eyes, cupping her face gently. She whispered softly and shook her head, closing her eyes.
"If it were not for me, you would not be feeling this... this horrible pain that you are feeling. I am the one who was responsible for the life we created and I could not do it." She sobbed softly, wrapping his arms around her self. Benedict shook his head, tilting his head to look at her.
"Look at me. You did nothing wrong, sweetheart. You can not blame yourself, do you understand me?" He pulled her into his arms again, kissing her forehead. He heard her soft whimpers as she cried into his chest, gripping the back of his jacket.
"I love you so much." She murmured, sniffling softly.
"I love you too. We will get through this together, as we have everything. I promise." He whispered, holding her as close to him as he possibly could.
-
The Bridgerton House remained dark for the following days, emotionally if not tangibly. Every family member was heartbroken over the loss of Madeleine and Benedict's unborn child.
Anthony and Colin had grown very excited to become uncles, eagerly awaiting the birth of their niece or nephew. Even Eloise, who was not entirely infatuated with children, could not hide her happiness for the new addition to their family.
Benedict stood in the doorway of the nursery early the next morning, hardly able to bring himself to enter. He stared dejectedly at the mobile as it swung gently with the breeze of the open window, the bluebirds mocking him as they danced above the crib.
He finally gathered enough courage to enter, running his hand slowly along the crib's railing. His heart ached in pain as he thought of what they lost, what they could have had.
Daphne and Violet had been packing up the nursery for the two, not wanting them to have to face it. The majority of the stuff was now tucked away in boxes, save for a small pink onesie that sat on top of the one of the boxes.
A tear rolled down Benedict's cheek as he picked it up, closing his eyes and hugging it close to his chest. His little girl would have worn that. She would have been smiling up at him as he woke her up in the morning, and she would have drifted off to sleep in his arms as he sung her a lullaby and rocked her gently in the chair.
Tears fell down his cheeks as he opened his eyes and picked up a box, tucking the onesie inside. It pained him far too much to look at it any longer.
He let out a dejected sigh and turned off the light, closing the nursery door behind him. He did not want Madeleine to walk past and look in, it would only serve as a reminder of the grief that plagued their relationship. He returned to his bedroom, sitting down on the edge of the bed.
Madeleine slept soundly, and he relished in peaceful look on her face. She was in so much pain when she was awake, he almost wished they could somehow sleep forever if it meant never having to wake and face the loss they had suffered. He gently smoothed her hair back, slowly leaning down and pressing a soft kiss on her forehead.
He knew they would get through this, so long as they did not push each other away in their own grief. They had always gotten through any hardships they had faced, and they had done it by sticking together. He knew that as long as they held on to each other, they would one day be okay again.
