The Edge

Luca: Part Six

I went back to that place again.

When Cassandra first mentioned bilocating to The Edge, it was only in passing as a weird dream. As the months went on, she talked about it more and more. Came to realize that there was more to it than just dreams. Began referring to it simply as that place.

I can see the stars more clearly this time. Still have no idea where it is. Still having a hard time moving. It's getting easier, but I move so slowly. I usually snap back before I can turn around.

I was able to glance over my shoulder this time. It looked like there was a lot of debris. More than I've ever seen in one place. All human-made space junk, nothing natural.

I think there's another person here.

Turned around a bit more. It's not a person. It's a body. Didn't get a good look at the face, but I think their visor is busted. Whatever's under there probably doesn't look pretty. Maybe I shouldn't look.

I don't think I'm dreaming. I don't even think these are nightmares. I'm too cold and I can feel some of the pressure when I wake up. I'm definitely going out there. But where's there? I don't know if I want to look at that body, but if there's some kind of logo on their suit, maybe I can figure out where I'm going.

I can't tell the others about this. Not without evidence. What am I supposed to say? "Hey, I'm bilocating against my will some nights but I don't know where I'm going, just that it's far away?" Waste of time. Even if they believe me, I have this journal if I want to vent about stuff that has no answers.

That hurt Luca's heart. He would've listened if she'd told him. Granted, she was right that he wouldn't be able to do anything...except worry. He'd worry a lot, especially if he saw her get more and more obsessed about this. But would she have done that if she'd had someone real to talk to?

"You don't know for sure," Luca whispered to himself. "Don't get too caught up in it." He kept reading, hoping that more information would keep his obsessive anxiety at bay.

Turned my head the other way. There's some kind of ship back there. I think I saw "Erebus" written on the side. It looks old. I'll have to research that later, but I'm slammed at work right now. I'm probably going to be slammed for a while, but I guess that's better than having too much work on my hands. I'm starting to get why Luca played the guitar before.

So, she'd seen the Erebus while bilocating—and Luca was starting to believe more and more that she really had been bilocating. She wasn't interested enough in ship wrecks for them to show up in her stress dreams, and by her own admission, she wasn't immediately familiar with it. There was no reason for that ship to be rattling around in her subconscious; ergo, she must have seen it sort-of-in-person. That didn't explain how she was bilocating out that far, but it helped explain why she might be interested in coming out here.

The next batch of entries was pretty mundane. They were shorter and talked about stuff like ship problems, new places to visit, staying busy. She either wasn't bilocating or wasn't talking about it until she had a lull in her job. That was when she started talking about going back again.

Nothing happens out there. It's just quiet. The stars feel so much further away. I know that's not how stars work, but something about that place feels so big and strange.

Sometimes I think if I stare long enough, I can see something in the dark.

Finally looked up the ship. It was lost to the Edge years ago. That explains why it feels so empty out there, I guess. Doesn't explain how or why I'm there.

I tried to move around more. Couldn't. I can look over both shoulders but that's it. I know moving in space is more difficult when I do this, but it's really fucking annoying. I just want to figure out what's going on here.

Helen called today.

Luca hesitated at that entry. He'd only intended to read the entries about the Edge, and had so far skimmed through everything else. He wanted to preserve at least some of Cassandra's privacy, but this felt relevant. Yes, he felt shitty thinking that; he could clearly remember how Helen had responded to Arian's accusations, how closed-off and quiet she'd been after. Luca had been afraid to touch anything she'd even been near, just in case he risked feeling that pain secondhand. But still...

He wasn't actively focused on connecting with the journal anymore, and the impressions he'd gotten from it were already starting to fade. That page still felt...colder somehow. Emotionally frosty. Not what he'd expect from Cassandra writing about her twin sister. He read the next few lines.

Didn't return the call. I don't have the mental energy to deal with her right now. Her therapist really needs to talk to her about not being such a fixer.

Luca winced. Again, Arian's accusations rang in his ears, joined by every complaint he'd ever overheard about their oldest sister. That she had a habit of pushing people away when it was obvious she needed help. That she could be too intense. Too involved when you didn't need or want it. He'd never joined in those complaints himself, never always understood them...

"Don't be stupid. Admit it already: she's done it to you too."

Panic slammed into his chest like a punch. He knew that voice; of course he did. But there was no possible way it could be her. Could there?

Luca's entire body shook as he looked over his shoulder. One of the crystals behind him had a fairly large flat plane to it, almost like a mirror. He saw himself in it, and sitting next to him, so close they were almost touching was Cassandra. Her braids weren't as well-kept as usual, her clothes were rumpled, and there was a dull look in her eyes as she stared at him. He'd never seen that expression on her before. "Don't lie," she said. "She does it to you all the time, and you hate it."

Luca glanced at the space where Cassandra should have been. He looked back at the crystal. She was right there.

He blinked.

Suddenly, she wasn't there.

Oh, no. I'm losing my mind.