60. Loose Ends (2)

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She stands over the body.

A little black girl, small on the cold metal table, long enough to fit a grown man. A white sheet covers the rest of her body, only the top pulled back to expose her head, thick black hair haloed about her. At some point, it would have been matted with blood.

In her years as a social worker, this isn't the first dead body Tanya has seen. People do awful things to children, and she sees some of the worst. In order to save them, you have to see them.

That doesn't make this any easier.

The body looks a lot like Maya, from the button nose to the heart shaped face. She's sure, if she pulled back those eyelids, her eyes would be brown, too.

The body looks a lot like Maya.

"Mrs-" the medical examiner breaks into the silence of the morgue.

"Call me Tanya." The words fall out automatically.

"Tanya, we need you to make the ID. Is this your daughter? Is this Maya?" She asks, pushing as gently as she can. Tanya knows how this goes, she's been there for dozens like this. It's different when it might be your child.

"The response is usually immediate, isn't it?" She asks, instead of replying.

"Excuse me?"

"From the family. Or the friends. When they see the body, they usually respond straight away. I know. I've seen them before. Real ones, not dramatised ones. I'm supposed to know right away."

"It's okay not to. If it is her, she would look very different now." The M.E tries to reassure her. It doesn't work. Tanya knows exactly what she has to say to her.

"I watched her sleep a lot, as a baby, as a child. Sometimes even now, or... Before she disappeared. When I'd come home late, I'd stand in her doorway and just watch her sleep, remind myself why I do what I do. She always sleeps so deeply, the end of the world couldn't wake her. I used to say she sleeps like the dead. But it's nothing like this."

"Tanya, is this Maya?" She asks again. She must be getting impatient, but Tanya can't bring herself to care. Let her wait. She's had to wait weeks.

"After her dad left, she wouldn't sleep alone. I think she knew I didn't like to sleep in an empty bed. So I'd come home, and she'd be sleeping on his side, all tangled up in my quilt, snoring in that little way she does. I never could bring myself to move her. She gets this kind of... Sixth sense, you know? Not all the time, but sometimes she just... Knows, when someone needs her. It's like her superpower."

"Tanya, please, the police need to know."

She falls silent again, staring down at the body. She'd expected relief, if she realised that it wasn't her little girl. But it's always going to be someone's little girl.

"That's not my daughter. This isn't Maya."

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