Storm and Silence Fanfic

The Present of Presence

~15 May 1843~

Damn him.

"Papa gone." Carter says.

"Yes, he's very busy." I join them in the sitting room, dropping down onto one of the settees. "He had a hard day at work, so he just needs some time by himself."

"Papa play?" Genna asks. I lean over and ruffle her curls, shaking my head. Even though Rick has never once bothered to play a game with his children, they still ask if he will. I always make up some excuse to them without crushing them with the reality, about how he wants absolutely nothing to do with them. Or me.

"Mama why you sad?" Carter climbs into my laps and brushes my tears away with his pudgy little baby fingers. I realized I had been looking up the stairs, not even realizing how upset I was.

"No, mama's being silly." I shake my head. "Come on, let's play something quick, then I'll give you dinner and cake, then it's off to bed."

Once I give the children their plates, I make one for Rick. Telling them to behave, I climb the stairs and knock on his office door.

"Enter." He says.

He doesn't look up at me as I walk inside. I place his plate at the corner of the desk. When I start to leave and he says, "Explain."

"Explain what?" I ask, turning around, trying not to look guilty.

He looks up with that icy glare on his face.

"My ink bottle is almost empty and the only paper I left on the desk this morning has mysteriously vanished. Also, some ink blots that were on this desk when I found it on the side of the road years ago are missing. I do not like to repeat myself, wife, but I will say it one more time. Explain."

"I...was looking for paper. To write your mother another note and accidentally spilled it. I'm sorry, Rick, I really am. I know I'm meant to stay out of here, but I can buy more. I still have money left from-"

"Ah, yes. My mother. Let's discuss this."

"No, we don't have to. I can see you're busy. I'll just get some cake and-"

"Sit, Lillian."

"I don't work for you anymore, sir. You can't order me around."

"You're my wife. You belong to me as much as any employee."

I scoff.

"I belong to no man, especially not you, you chauvinistic bastard-"

Faster than my children can make a mess of a clean room, he gets up and stands before me, my breath catching in my throat before I can spit out another insult.

"There she is, the Lilly I married three years ago." He growls. I take a step back, knocking into the door and it snaps shut. "You haven't called me that in a while."

"That's because you haven't been around enough for me to." I snap, realizing how angry that makes me.

"Is that right?"

"Yes, it is. You never spend time with us, with me. You work all day and come home and shut yourself in this stupid room. You don't talk to your children and the only thing you say to me has to do with your food. Your children still love you, god knows why. You're the most miserable, stingy miser who's ever walked this planet!"

"Indeed?" His eyes rage, a dark storm swirling in their depths.

"Indeed! You won't allow me to work anymore, so I stay home, with the children with whom you want nothing to do, wondering what I did wrong and-" I stop. I got too caught up in this.

"What you did?" I look down at my shoes, silent. "What does that  mean?"

"Nothing. I need to check on the children." I try to open the door, but his arm is up in a flash, holding it closed.

"What did that mean?" With his other hand he lifts my chin so our eyes meet.

"You want to know what that means?" I ask, my eyes blazing as they meet his cold ones. If I didn't know him better, I would have thought he flinched. "Fine. I understand you didn't want any of this to happen--the kids, the house...me as your wife. But this is your reality. You could at least try to make the best of it. Would it kill you to be nice to your kids? They are yours." I spit, remembering the one time he threw that in my face. He lets go of my chin and something else flashes in his eyes, but I continue. "Carter is the spitting image of you. You want nothing to do with me? Fine. Ignore me, add everything I cost you to my debt, I don't care. But one day, you're going to wake up and realize you shouldn't have scorned your children so much, and it'll be too late. I don't want that for you. You're about to lose m-" I stop myself. I've already said too much. He doesn't care. He probably thinks I'm only wasting his time with all this emotional nonsense.  "I'll bring some cake for you later. I'm going to make sure my babies are okay."

I rip the door open and he lets me go.

I walk down the stairs, determined not to cry. I feel good, giving that stupid man a piece of my mind. I can't believe I ever cared about him once. He doesn't deserve it. I should have known a man like him would never be capable of loving anything except his money.

I cut a slice of cake and put it on a plate and deliver it to Rikkard. I march into the office and place it beside his untouched food. He's standing by the window and looks at me when I come in. He opens his mouth to speak, but I spin around on my heel and shut the door, ignoring him as he says my name.

I sit at the table to finish dinner with my kids.

"Papa's present?"

"I'll give it to him later, he's still busy." They're not happy with this answer, but continue eating, chattering all the while.

A few moments later I hear the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. Rikkard appears with his plate in his hands.

He sits down at the table. The room is silent. Both kids look at me in confusion and I shrug. This has never happened before.

"Good evening, children." He sounds strained, like this is painful for him. He looks to me and I nod encouragingly, wondering what he's going to do. "How was your day?"

Carter and Genna start babbling away, but I don't listen to them. He looks at me, then to his children.

"Mama sad?" Genna reaches over and touches one of my tears. I look over at my husband and shake my head.

"No, mama's very happy."

*

I liked writing this scene. It seems like Lilly was finally able to get to Mr Ambrose and he seems to be turning over a new leaf. :D

Thanks to everyone who's been voting. I've got over 500 reads and I'm so excited. :D you guys are really the best.

I hope you're still enjoying the story.

~Hamilfan123987